12 Andy Samberg Emmys Monologue Jokes That Had Us Laughing Way Too Hard

As a first-time host of the Primetime Emmy Awards, Andy Samberg is off to a running start. Known for his creating comic music magic with his rap group The Lonely Island on and off of Saturday Night Live, Samberg had no real choice but to open the ceremony with a cameo-filled song and dance number — and it was not at all a disappointment. Kerry Washington, Nathan Fillion, and Jon Hamm were among the stars who helped the host soft-shoe into his monologue, as he sang an ode to the intense pressure every television fan feels to keep up with the content hitting from networks, premium cable, streaming services, and so on and so on. After that, Samberg segued into his live monologue, and I'm happy to report that there were way more winners and losers as far as his gags and jokes were concerned. So, what were Andy Samberg's best and worst jokes from his Emmys monologue?

As I expected, Samberg didn't go as caustic as another host might have. He's a member of the community and works with a lot of these people, so the personal ribbing was light and good-natured. He saved most of his sarcasm for the overarching industry problems that every person in Hollywood is at least tangentially aware of: the age gap, the wage gap, and the frankly ridiculous diversity gap. Donald Trump, Kim Davis, and even Les Mis bad guy Javert didn't walk away unscathed.

Here are the jokes that really made an impression:

The Best:

"And I'm white!"

The closing line of his Emmys song skewered Hollywood's diversity problem, and it wasn't Samberg's last joke at its expense.

"You're gonna have to deal with the mean nun from Game of Thrones."

This was in reference to anyone whose speeches might be too long. Jane Lynch made a cameo as the most terrifying character on television, who wordy winners will allegedly need to face.

"Racism is over, don't fact check that."


"Is it me, or does Bernie Sanders always look like his flight is delayed?"

No one has been able to accurately put this into words before.

"If I wanted to see an intolerant lady dance, I would have gone to one of Kim Davis' four weddings."

Zing on the Kentucky clerk who's been in the news lately.

"Schumer is really, really funny. You know. For a person."

Samberg sticks it to everyone who's ever set female comedians apart from their male colleagues.

"He escaped!"

This Adrien Brody-as-Houdini joke was easy... but still amazing.


"Justin Timberlake is not coming."

Not really a bad joke, just bad news. Miss you, JT.

"And we also said goodbye to True Detective, even though it's still on the air."


"Get your house in order, Dagwood from Blondie."

Way too obscure, but I appreciate the effort.

"Guy kills so many Predators. I guess he knows what he's doing."

Even Samberg knew immediately that this Arnold Schwarzenegger bit didn't work.

"I just gotta talk to Stacee Jaxx about Brian Wilson!"

This Paul Giamatti/typecasting joke could have come off better.

I think it's safe to say, Samberg killed it.

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