5 Weird But Cool Things That Happen When You Start Feeling Confident In Your Love Life
When someone is in a healthy kind of love, different facets of her life are positively benefited in different ways — especially in terms of confidence. You can become more confident in your love life in numerous different ways, regardless of her current relationship status. If you're single, you may finally realize that you don't have to settle for anybody. If you're in a serious relationship, you may find that the confidence born from a stable and fulfilling partnership has carried over into your career and creative endeavors. If you're in a casual relationship(s), you will understand and honor your boundaries. So what happens when you become more confident in your love life?
Whether you are generally happier throughout the day, or more cognizant of your desires and thus more active in attempting to obtain them, life is a little rosier. Everything feels lighter when you are confident — either about your current relationship or about the type of relationship to which you are entitled.
Of course, love can be stressful, too. The exhilarating joy of a new romance may make it difficult to fall asleep, according to a study out of University of Basel, Switzerland, but thankfully there are quite a few pretty cool things that happen when you become confident in love as well:
1. You Stop Dressing For Other People (Unless You Are Trying To Impress A Special Someone ;-] )
The confidence that you experience in your relationship permeates the rest of your existence, and in the words of Nicki and Bey, you are feeling yourself, feeling yourself. When you get dressed, you wear what makes you feel beautiful and fabulous because it suddenly so easy to be a fan of your own reflection. Maybe your partner has helped you to see your body in a different way. Or maybe you are just really happy. Regardless, you don't seek the approval of randos in the bar because their opinions are irrelevant to your life, and that is finally clear. However. there is a special someone you may still get dressed up for once in a while, and that's just part of the fun of a relationship.
2. You're Not Afraid To Disagree With People Or Your Partner
This one stands whether you are in a casual or serious relationship. Your confidence in both yourself and your romantic life (which feed each other) means that you'll let go of that people-pleasing instinct; you no longer feel like you have to please everyone in order for them to like you. In a serious relationship, you'll know that you and your partner respect each other enough to have disagreements that don't symbolize the end of the world — or at least don't symbolize the end of your relationship. And if it is a disagreement that represents a fundamental discord in you both as people, then it's not meant to be anyway. Likewise, if its a casual relationship, and your partner can't handle, for example, your feminist #realness, then they gotta go regardless. Other than that, again, it's not gonna mark the end of days. You can stand proudly in your beliefs and engage in discourse surrounding them without fear.
3. You Don't Look For Every Mistake You Made In Every Mundane Interaction
You will finally allow yourself to chill and not sweat your use of emojis in that last text message or replay every conversation that you've had with your significant other or crush. You know that your relationship goes beyond mundane niceties at this point, so you don't waste your time overanalyzing them.
4. You Don't Feel Like You Need To Be With Someone
You no longer feel like you have to be in a relationship just to be in a relationship. You have a partner because it improves your life, and you don't feel as though you have to settle in order to achieve a relationship. Likewise, because you recognize that you deserve healthy, stable, and trusting interactions, you don't seek companionship with a person who won't fulfill your desire for a mature, safe, enjoyable relationship.
5. You Know Your Worth
You know what you deserve now. And it's not being someone's sidechick or supporting someone who walks out on you whenever they feel like a relationship is too much work. Crissle West of The Read podcast got right to the point in the empowering and vital episode called "Say No To F*ckboys." When you are confident in your love life, you say no because you are worthy of so much better (if you haven't already found it).
Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our new podcast, I Want It That Way, which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page.