9 Things All Harry Potter Fans Will Always Be United By, No Matter How Old We Get
A lot of things in our lives will change as we grow older, but the one common thread that unites nerds of the magical variety is that there are some feelings Harry Potter fans will take to the grave. Even when you put your obsession on mute and pretend to live like a normal Muggle for a little while, it's always there, brewing right under the surface, threatening to explode like Neville's many unfortunate cauldrons in Potions. It may be something little, like a lightning bolt-shaped patch of graffiti on the sidewalk; it may be something large, like you publicly flying into a blind rage when you overhear someone on the subway saying, "Really, guys, Snape is the most tragic hero of a our time." (UGH DON'T GET ME STARTED.) My point is, there is a distinctly Harry Potter-colored shade to your heart, and you'll never be able to rub it off.
But hey, look at it this way — I've got a feeling that the old folk's homes of 2075 are going to be so full of Potterheads that we won't even know what to do with ourselves. (JK, we're starting our own Quidditch teams, of course.) By then we will no doubt be every bit as permanently united by these Potterhead feelings as we are now:
You Will Infinitely Hate Dolores Umbridge Until Your Dying Breath
Somebody could deliberately run you over with their car and set you on fire and you'd still like them more than Dolores Umbridge. Hem, hem.
You Will Never Get Over The Unspeakable Despair Of Not Getting Your Hogwarts Letter
I shouldn't even typed that. It's been 13 years and the wound is still too fresh.
Secretly All You Want Is To Be Adopted By The Weasley Family
I already live with a bunch of awesome gingers, personally, but even I could not resist the allure of being a part of the frumpy maroon knitted sweater squad.
You Understand That December Is 31 Days Solely To Finish Your Harry Potter Movie Marathons
I'm pretty sure J.K. Rowling consulted with whoever invented the Gregorian calendar before this was all put into effect, right?
You Will Defend Ronald Weasley To Your Damn Grave
When you were younger, maybe, you didn't realize what a short end of the stick poor Ron got — but when you reread the books as an adult, and realize that if the books had been real WE ALL BASICALLY WOULD HAVE BEEN HIM, you're so #TeamRon that even J.K. Rowling's random post-edits can't sway you.
You Still Occasionally Tear Up In Public Over Your Dead Faves
You, standing at the bus stop on a Tuesday: "Dobbyyyyyyy."
You Genuinely Fear The Life Partner You Choose Will Have Nothing On Whoever Your Biggest HP Crush Was
I'm so ready to Quid-ditch anyone who isn't half as baller as Oliver.
You're In A Perpetual State Of "I Need To Read The Books Again"
There is no "last time". I mean, at some point we'll die, but I personally plan on coming back as a ghost just to keep reading (and terrify my unwitting descendants).
You Know That Home Is Where Your Harry Potter Books Are
Until the very end and always.
Images: Warner Bros; Giphy