Recently we have all mourned the passing of our beloved Socality hipster Barbie Instagram, but it's time for the hipsters on the West Coast to step aside — there's a new Barbie in town, and she's telling it like it is, one high heel stuck in a subway grate at a time. Meet the Honest New York City Barbie Instagram, the latest and greatest iteration of your childhood dollies. Brought to us by Mashable's Andrea Romano, she shows us all that living your best life doesn't always mean living your most Insta-worthy life. In fact, a lot of the time, it means living like a big ole hot mess.
As one of the 8.046 million hot messes currently populating the enchantingly smelly city of New York, I can attest to the validity of this Barbie's struggles. Sure, this city is full of magic like bagels, Broadway, and occasionally running into Penn Badgely on the L train (XOXO GOSSIP GIRL), but it's also like its own Hunger Games. Except with a lot more garbage, and a lot fewer existentially-fraught teenage love triangles. (A girl can dream.)
Whatever the hell New York is, Honest NYC Barbie is navigating it the best that she can, becoming the urban heroine we all deserve. Here are just a few of her adventures that New Yorkers know the struggle of all too well:
When The Subway Eats Your Paycheck
I set aside approximately five minutes to openly, publicly weep every month, and it's usually that moment I pull the Metrocard out of the machine with the resignation of someone pulling a gaping knife out of their side before they BLEED TO DEATH.
When You Get Wine Turnt Alone On A Friday Night
Oh, Honest NYC Barbie, the truths you speak. I personally would like to think I was setting an example for New York's youth when I recently rolled into Union Square carrying as many bottles of three buck chuck as my Hello Kitty backpack could possibly handle.
When Your Parents Secretly Breathe A Sigh Of Relief That You Even Found A Job
I feel ya, girl. Somewhere faintly in the distance (aka, my parent's house) my psych degree is weeping.
When Your Tinder Date Is ... Well ...
*quietly deletes all dating apps and marries a grilled cheese sandwich*
Really, the only problem I can find with Honest NYC Barbie is that we aren't BFFs yet. Not only has she filled the void in our hearts that Socality left behind (THERE IS NOT NEARLY ENOUGH VALENCIA IN MY FEED ANYMORE, GUYS), but she has filled another void my heart didn't even know it had. She just gets us. And if I have my way, she'll be mayor by 2016.
Images: Courtesy of Andrea Romano