14 New Year's Resolutions For Guys You've Dated
While you're figuring out your resolutions to becoming a better you this year, have you ever stopped to consider what others should be committing to make the world a better place? One of the most obvious considerations is New Year's resolutions people you've dated should make, because we all know there's a lot to be improved upon in that department.
Whether you ended things amicably, irreconcilably, or had the honor of being "ghosted" on by someone you didn't even like that much, there's probably some much-needed advice you'd like to dish out to them now that they're back in the dating pool — from instructions to properly communicating from the get-go and beyond to not completely botching the first date; from refraining from bad boyfriend tactics that put your love on the line to post-breakup etiquette five plus years out.
The basic rules to dating seem simple, but it may be time to offer up some constructive criticism to ensure a better dating environment for 2016. If you're a guy and reading this, try to be open minded and not take offense. This lineup is an amalgamation of some of the worst dating faux pas. If certain resolutions seem like obvious guidelines — congratulations! You're a decent human being. If some leave you befuddled, make them your new mantra, and get to work on the new year, new you.
Scoring The Date...
1. If you're interested in her and she gives you her number, follow up.
2. Don't delete your Tinder account after the first date.
Whether she's agreed to a second date or you've simply decided she's The One, give it more time before locking down into full blown relationship mode. If you do delete your Tinder definitely do not disclose this to her, or your second date will be your last.
3. Don't put down girls if you can't pick them up.
There's no need to advertise your d-baggery. If you start negging as soon as she shows disinterest, you're just reenforcing every assumption she made about you. Practice some self-control, and realize this is probably why she turned you down in the first place.
If You Do Score A Date...
4. Clear your creepy search history, and close those browser windows.
There's nothing as unnerving as hanging out with a person for the first time and seeing your own photo (or someone else's) pop up on their screen when they open their computer. As far as everything else, browsers have incognito windows for a reason.
5. Always have a date plan.
If you've asked a girl out on a date and she's agreed, have a plan for the night. Sure, spontaneity is great, but at least have a destination or two lined up and some general idea of where the night's refreshments and entertainment are coming from.
6. Unless it's mutually agreed upon, don't mix date nights with games (of the video, sports, or mind variety).
In the beginning, date nights are a time to get to know one another. Keep the evening about having conversations and experiencing things together. Your date shouldn't be a bystander of your everyday life.
7. Don't vocalize your archaic generalizations about women.
Think she comes off too strong about her career goals? Weirded out that she chugs her beer faster than you do? Your problem, not hers.
8. Don't talk about your high school prom date.
Your prom date (or any other girl you have history with) is not a first date conversation topic. Donate your letterman jacket. Throw out your high school trophies. Move on.
9. Don't compare her to your exes.
You're with her, not them. It's as simple as that. If you need to make your girlfriend insecure to feel better about your relationship, you need to take a look at your life.
Once Things Have Fizzled...
10. Don't quote Katy Perry when explaining yourself.
"I can't be your Teenage Dream" are words that should never come out of your mouth.
11. Don't pretend you're "ghosting" when you're really being a sore loser.
Can't handle rejection? Go your own way before she breaks it off. But don't flatter yourself by calling yourself a ghost. Be a good sport.
12. When texting exes, stop using Google Voice's anonymous phone numbers to trick them into coffee dates.
True, your ex won't agree to meet up with you if they know it's you texting, but they also won't agree to meet up with a stranger. Come on now.
13. Don't go to the bar with your high school ex-girlfriend when you know your college ex-girlfriend will be there.
In sum, stop trying to be a part of your exes' lives.
14. Don't unfriend your ex on LinkedIn five years after the breakup.
You already missed your threshold. At this point it's weirder to seem like you care.
Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our new podcast,I Want It That Way, which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page.
Images: whitebalance.oatt/E+/Getty Images; Giphy (18)