I Love Seeing Engagement Posts On Facebook, And I'm Single AF
When one of my dearest, best friends got engaged in Italy this year, she became the first in my friend group to start heading down the aisle. It was one of those moments that I’ll never forget — while having lunch with my family, I saw her engagement post on Facebook and she texted me, and instantly started tearing up. Not because her husband-to-be is wonderful (he is), not because she’s my best friend (she is), but because I was so genuinely happy for her new adventure into marriage.
But of course, she’s not the only person in my Facebook news feed to sport a new diamond or give one this year. Over the past weeks between Thanksgiving and now, at least a dozen or so people from college, high school, my job, or various groups have popped the question or answered it. My feed is filled with ecstatic faces, sweet stories, gorgeous rings and couples who have happily decided to spend their lives together.
And I love it.
Even though I’m single AF (read: for the last four years and counting), and sometimes I’m a little jealous AF (hey, I admit it!), I secretly adore each and every time someone gets engaged. Sure, my single friends and I might roll our eyes and comment on how holiday weekends means our Facebook turns into Ringbook, but I always like the announcement. Sometimes I even comment or congratulate the pair. If the proposal story is particularly heart-warming, I might even have a full-on texting conversation with my other single girlfriends, sighing and hoping for my own happy ending (or let’s be real — a happy beginning would even be nice these days). I think engagements — and love in general — is something to be celebrated with champagne, humble tears and of course, a couple hundred ‘likes.’
I feel like the outlier though. When I talk to some of my single friends who are also in the dating trenches, they aren’t as excited about couples showing off their new statuses. Though I love her, I’ve even had a friend go as far as to say ‘Why do you they post it on Facebook? Like could you rub it in anymore that you’re so happy and we’re so not?’
I get it. It can sometimes be super overwhelming to watch my friends (in real life and in Facebook life) take the next step in their lives when I’m still figuring out what pair of shoes to wear on a second date and if I actually like some dude enough to be called his girlfriend. While they’re setting a date, I’m still going on them. While they’re picking out their colors, their music and their cake, I’m praying every single night that I don’t have to go stag to their big affair. It can be frustrating, sure, especially after you see one engagement after another, but for me, these posts are far less about playing the ‘why am I still single game?’ and more about reminding me about how much love there really is in the world (and maybe even in New York City).
Here’s why I love when people announce their engagement on Facebook:
1. It Inspires Me
When it comes to guys, I haven’t exactly been lucky at finding good ones. I won’t generalize every single man into one category of selfish assholes, but I’m finding that the ones I meet either only want to bang or want to bang without the commitment or get the benefits without actually have a relationship with you.
For someone who wants to be with only one person one day, and isn’t meeting one who wants to be exclusive, it’s inspiring to know that there are people out there who can be faithful. Who can — and want to —be great partners. There are people who will plan every detail, save every penny and say those kinds words and mean them. I may not have met one yet, but if my friends can, I surely can too.
2. It Balances Out The Bad
I try my best not to join in on the infamous Facebook debates that roll through my feed constantly, as my friends are half from North Carolina and half from New York, so they feel very differently about, well, everything. Most news that goes viral is bad news or worthless news, so when someone posts their engagement, it’s a needed break and happy moment to turn your attention to.
3. It Brings People Together
When a pair gets engaged from college and you watched their entire relationship unfold over four years and they finally tie the knot, classmates come back together to share the stories of how they ended up together. Or, when one of your girlfriends struggled with the dating scene for years and years, and finally met someone wonderful — everyone is overjoyed to see that her hard work in dating (and waiting) paid off. Any type of big life event — especially one that brings two families together into one — will help build conversation, positive memories and of course, love.
4. It Shows That Relationships Can Work
Sure, Facebook doesn’t tell the whole story of any relationship, nor should it. No one knows the intricate details and stories of any couple except for the two people in the bond, but for a pair to step forward and say, ‘We want this life together’ says something powerful. There’s no guarantee that every marriage will work (even though, divorce rates are dropping), even taking the first step forward in unison shows that not all relationships are doomed to fail.
5. It’s Silly To Rain On Someone’s Happiness
Even if you’re not excited to see someone’s Facebook announcement or you’re getting burned out of their ‘I’m engaged!’ status updates, what purpose does it serve to be negative toward them or talk about them? If you don’t like it, ignore it. If you do, drop them a line. I can promise you it’ll mean the world to them and possibly, be a text message, phone call, or Facebook message they’ll never forget.
Instead of being down about love, why don’t we create more of it? Karma is almost as powerful as your Facebook feed, after all.
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