8 New Year’s Resolutions For When You're Single And Not Dating
We have finally reached that time of year when many people decide to make New Year’s resolutions. With one year behind us and a brand new one to conquer, resolving to make the most of the upcoming year and somehow make ourselves better, is a natural instinct to have. It’s like you have a clean slate, so you might as well give yourself the goal of keeping that slate as clean as possible, before mucking it all up.
While many will resort to New Year's resolutions involving exercise or maybe being kinder to people who accidentally bump into them on the street, for single women who aren’t dating, their focus should be on something else. In fact, their focus, at least in regards to resolutions, should be on themselves, their expectations for their future, and maybe steering clear of any emotional or mental aggravation that comes with dating or being in a relationship. I’m not suggesting that you totally give up on the occasional date, but if you’re single, why not embrace it instead of fighting it?
So if you're not seriously dating anyone, cruising into the new year single, and trying to think up some resolutions that you can stick to for 2016, here are eight ideas to get the wheels in your brain churning. Resolve to...
1. Open Your Mind (And Heart) To New Possibilities
While this could immediately be taken as, “Go out there and meet someone new with an open heart,” that’s not what I mean. What I do mean is open your mind and heart to new possibilities that aren’t in the form of dating someone. You could try being more social, going to more events, and maybe even resolve to get off the couch more. Opening your heart doesn’t always mean in regards to romantic love, but could actually mean in regards to friendship, too. You can never have too many friends.
2. Take Yourself On Dates
You know who deserves an expensive dinner at the fancy restaurant everyone has been talking about for months? You. If you’re someone who lives in fear of going out to eat alone, then resolve to get over that, because you're one hell of an awesome date. Once you start going out to dinner alone, you may find you prefer it that way. You don’t have to make conversation, you can order two desserts without worrying about the person across the table giving you the side-eye, and you get to drink the whole bottle of wine without having to share.
3. Stop Engaging With Creeps On Dating Apps
I have friends who, even though they’re not really dating at the moment, just love to get into it with creeps on dating apps. Yes, it’s really entertaining to give jerks a dose of their own medicine, but it’s also a waste of your time. You don’t have to delete your dating apps, because you never know when you might be looking for a hookup or meet someone new, but just stop wasting too much time on them if they're not doing anything for you. You have better things to do.
4. Get A Hobby
As much as we like to believe that watching TV is a hobby, it technically is not. Because that’s the case, get yourself a real hobby, like painting, or photography, or mastering a new language. I plan to take up the piano again. I figure after a decade of lessons as a kid, it must be like riding a bike… which can also be a hobby, too!
5. Buy Your Own Flowers
For me, what aches most about being single are the little things. I miss the little treats, like him coming home with my favorite bottle of wine, bringing me daisies when he knew my day was horrible, or taking a photo of a cute puppy he saw on the street and sending it to me ― that sort of stuff. Because I miss those things, I’ve resolved to do those sweet things for myself. I will buy my own flowers, because flowers make people feel happy. I will pick up my favorite bottle of wine, because I can. And when I see a cute puppy, I resolve to steal it... er, I mean pet it and relish in the joy that puppies bring. In other words, I will supply my own happiness.
6. Evolve Past Your Ex
Whether you broke up three week ago, three months ago, or three years ago, there’s no time like the present to evolve past your ex and accept that your life is better without them. Never forget: You broke up for a reason and that’s something you need to remind yourself of every time you start to slip into the thought process of your ex being the best. They’re not; you're the best and they should be kicking themselves that they no longer have you.
7. Promise To Cross Something Major Off Your Bucket List
What your 2016 really needs is you to finally make some progress on your bucket list. If you’ve realized that you haven’t paid enough attention to your bucket list recently, then revisit it. If it means finally sky-diving, going to the Taj Mahal, or starting that business on Etsy you’ve be thinking about, then do it. Being single frees up a lot of your time to focus on bigger things, things that are likely to change your life forever.
8. Don’t Make 2016 About Meeting Someone New
I’ll spare you the whole, “you’ll meet someone when you’re not looking,” because we’ve heard it all before. But just because you’re single, you shouldn’t make 2016 about finding someone with whom you can partner up. If it happens, then it happens. If it doesn’t, then it doesn’t. Make your priority about you and what you want to do. Eventually, the rest of it will fall into place, and yes, it will probably be when you’re not looking for it.
Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our new podcast, I Want It That Way, which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page.
Images: Fotolia; Giphy (8)