Never Say These Things To People With Thin Brows

by Rosie W.

As a person with thin eyebrows, I know I am no Lily Collins, but you try telling that to professional makeup artists. "It's all in product application," they might say. As if we, the brow-challenged, hadn't heard it before. As if we haven't been the recipient of so much sage brow advice that we're able to compile a list of things people with thin brows are tired of hearing. This is a dark age for the skinny-, sparse-, or pale-browed, and it's time people with full brows understood the extent of our tribulations.

If you're having a hard time getting your brows on fleek, you're not alone. Anybody who was old enough to listen to Green Day and write bad poetry in the mid '00s likely ended their dreams of full brows with enthusiastic over plucking because — surely I'm not the only one who remembers this — thin eyebrows were in. So were chunky highlights, but we're not stuck suffering for the rest of our lives for that lapse in judgement. Turns out that tweezing over time damages your hair follicles, which results in wimpy regrowth, or none at all. Would have been nice to know at the time, right?

Of course, thin brows aren't always the result of over plucking. As the naturally thin-browed can attest, genetics are equally to blame. No matter the cause of your thin brows, we've all heard the same advice from people who actually wake up with eyebrows in the morning. These are the things thin-browed people could die happy never hearing again.

1. "Just Pencil Them In"

All penciling them in does is make it more apparent that I have no real eyebrows.

2. "But You Just Have To Draw In The Hairs"

HA. Anybody who has seriously offered this advice has only had to draw two hairs in at most.

3. "Have You Tried Anastasia's DipBrow?"


4. "Well What About Their —"


5. "Well What About Latisse/Revitalash/Magic?"

Unless Latisse can grow hair out of a barren desert wasteland, there's no point in trying it on my brows.

6. "Are You Still Waxing? Try Threading!

But I don't wax...

7. "Why Are You Threading? Try Tweezing!"

But I don't thread...

8. "Why Are You Still Tweezing? Let Them Grow!"

You think I've tweezed my eyebrows since this on fleek thing started?

9. "Just Tint Them"

There's no point if you only have like four hairs.

10. "Get Them Tattooed"

Have you ever had your face tattooed? I have. It a) hurts like hell, and b) costs all of the money.

11. "Have You Tried Eyebrow wigs?

And spend $50?

12. "Just Get Eyebrow Extensions"

And spend $400??

13. "Brow Game On Point!"

It's not a game.

14. The Words "On Fleek"

Just. Let. It. Die.

Images: Fotolia, Giphy (14)