It's only natural that when you're in a relationship, there are going to be many different emotions. These can range from feeling intense joy and happiness to feeling sad, confused, and unsure. There are many ups and downs, but how do you know when certain feelings reveal that your relationship has become too toxic? It's quite normal to be angry with your partner here and there. You and your partner will have some tough moments and hard discussions, but feeling constant anger or sadness may mean something else isn't quite right.
Being a relationship expert and life coach, I have seen how certain feelings can affect relationships to the point where it is no longer a healthy situation for either partner. Certain perpetual emotions are sometimes a sign that it's time to end your relationship because that relationship is no longer healthy. Or at least it means that you and your partner need to take a step back and truly work on your partnership. Rule of thumb: If you have more sad days with your significant other than happy for far too long, you need to take a harder look at what’s happening. Here are seven feelings that indicate a breakup might be in your future.
1. Resentment
You might think resentment is similar to anger, but you'd be wrong. It's on a whole different level. Resentment is anger built up for so long that it has taken on a new look. And this isn't a good look on you. If you have a lot of pent up resentment, it indicates that you have been sweeping things under the rug for far too long. You haven't been expressing your anger or disappointments as they happen. And, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it's easier to get over anger than it is to move past deep rooted grudges.
2. Guilt
Sometimes in a relationship one partner is more invested. The other partner knows this and realizes he or she holds all the power. This dynamic is very unhealthy for both parties. The one that is being treated like a king or queen may start to feel a little guilty because they know the relationship isn't a give and take situation — it's more like a take, take, take. If you are feeling guilty because you know your other half deserves better, it's time to give them something better. Either step up and offer the same amount of love and respect, or let them go and find someone else who can give it to them.
3. Feelings For Another Person
It's one thing in a relationship to find another person attractive, but it's another to have a deep love and longing for someone else. If you are truly, madly, deeply in love with your boyfriend or girlfriend, your heart is taken by only one person. It doesn't have the capacity to even feel such deep feelings for another person in that way. I'm not talking about a little crush; I'm talking about a hardcore deep and passionate love for someone else. If you find yourself caught in between a love triangle, you might need to cut yourself out of it.
4. Desire
Desiring others while you are in a relationship isn't necessarily a sign that it's time to end things. However, if you find yourself constantly desiring others and your wandering eye has wandered a bit too far, that's not fair to your other half. If you and your partner have committed to being in a monogamous committed relationship, then your lover deserves that respect. If you don't plan on holding up your end of the bargain, it's time to close this deal out.
5. Constant Questioning
It's fairly normal to have moments in your relationship where you question everything. After a big argument, you will think to yourself, "Do I want to be with this person for the rest of my life?" With that being said, questioning the relationship continuously means there's a bigger picture here. I think if you look at that picture with a microscope you will see that it might be your instinct or gut talking to you. Listen to it more carefully.
6. Gut Feeling
There are feelings we get sometimes that we can't explain and where words just don't it justice. When you know something isn't right, you just know it. That's your gut talking to you. You have an instinct for a reason. Often times we just don't want to believe what our gut is telling us. It's not easy to leave a partner. But, if you know it in your heart and in your gut, then you know what the true answer is already.
7. Distrust
I'm a big believer in having a foundation of trust and respect in a relationship. You know when you can trust someone, and you know when you can't. If there are times when you don't think you can trust your partner, then you probably can't. If you feel the need to look through his or her phone, emails and computer, then there the foundation of trust has already been broken.
A single, fleeting feeling probably doesn't mean anything in the grand scheme of an entire relationship, but if you're feeling any of these emotions non-stop, then it might be time to reevaluate the situation.
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