Entertainment

A Death on 'The Fosters'

by Christine DiStasio

Monday night's episode of ABC Family's The Fosters had a lot going on with Callie and the Foster family. Stef and Lena tried to figure out whether or not to accept a car from Stef's dad, it was family day at Callie's group home, and Jesus officially discovered the art of the semi-nude selfie. And that's just the tip of the episode's iceberg. Callie, Jude, Lena, and Stef all had some big news to share and some even bigger decisions to make.

The episode opened with Jesus detailing his new diet plan at breakfast so he doesn't have to be benched on the wrestling team anymore. (No eggs yolks, please and thank you.) He's also taken to wearing plastic garbage bags under his shirts so he can drop weight faster. All the power to ya, buddy. Later that day, Jude walks in on Jesus taking a semi-nude selfie to send to his wrestling team crush, Lexi. Awkward. So Jesus introduces the idea of "Jesus Time" to Jude, which basically means, "If there's a hat on the door, I'm taking nude selfies so the room is off-limits." Okay, Jesus, whatever you say.

Post-breakfast, Lena has a doctor's appointment, during which she asks her doctor whether or not she could still get pregnant at her age. To her surprise, her doctor says it's possible, but she runs some tests anyway and tells Lena she'll get back to her later — and when she does, it's with good news. Yay, Lena! But she hasn't told Stef yet.

Brandon returns (ugh) to apologize (double ugh) and ask if he can come to Family Day at Callie's new group home (triple ugh). Stef and Lena agree because they just want to be able to get their family back together again. So the Fosters arrive at the group home and obviously all of the other girls are jealous because A) Callie's family actually came to visit, and B) they brought her "boyfriend." She tells them all about a "day in the life" at the group home and things seem to be going alright even though Cole caught her with her cell phone last week.

Jude's pissed at Callie for pushing him away and not coming back to the Fosters. She obviously feels bad, but she did what she had to do to get him adopted. Which he confirms is actually happening, with or without her. Callie seems genuinely excited, but she also looks a little sad. That's what you get for choosing Brandon over a loving family, sister.

Meanwhile, Stef and Lena are having a chat with Rosie O'Donnell about adopting Jude and hopefully Callie — and also discussing their risky choice to bring Brandon to Family Day (ugh). Rosie looks kind of confused when they say they hope they can bring Callie home soon because, get ready for this — Callie's applied for the group home's Independent Living Program and she has no intention of going back to the Fosters. Stef and Lena walk in on Brandon and Callie "just talking" in the kitchen about those text messages Cole sent of Callie's secret cellphone (Lena assures them that talking is allowed) but it's obvious that there's still something going on, because there is.

Post-Family Day — Jude throws a book at Jesus because he's hogging their room with his "Jesus Time" (Stef and Lena are so happy that Jude called it "their" room that they let him off the hook), Stef and Lena fight over whether or not to accept the hybrid car Stef's dad wants to give them (Lena says yes, Stef says no because he didn't come to their wedding), and Callie gets her cellphone back from Cole and finds out that she's buying hormones off the street.

Callie and Brandon have a meeting that almost makes you like them in one of the other girl's new "Independent Living" apartment — he serenades her and they bicker about whether or not to buy a flat screen or a kitchen table first, aw. But it's short-lived because back the group home, Cole has a seizure and bangs her head from the hormones and Callie has to answer for herself about being a shitty roommate. All of the girls call her out on not making an effort in group therapy and not looking out for Cole — to which she responds as selfishly as possible by saying that no one wants to be at the group home, so what makes her any different than them. Just shut up, Callie. They tell her that she has people that want her to live with them and that's a hell of a lot more than they have, so yes, they do want to be there. So again, shut up, Callie.

Then Rosie O'Donnell pulls her aside for a heart-to-heart and calls her out for her commitment issues while also sharing a sad story about cheating on her husband. (Ugh, c'mon, Rosie.) But it seems like she's finally gotten through Callie blindness by love. Cole also returns and tells Callie that her parents didn't come to the hospital to see if she was okay — making Callie feel even worse about taking the Fosters for granted just to be with Brandon. So, she decides to turn in her secret cellphone and really make an effort at the group home because that's "where she wants to be." Good girl, Callie.

The episode ended with Stef going to her dad's house to apologize for being such a bitch about the brand new car he wanted to give them. But, in a devastating turn of events, she finds him dead in his living room chair with a football game blaring on the TV. Ugh, so sad. And now Stef has to deal with never making peace with her dad. But she might have a new baby and Callie back at home soon, so at least there's that to get her through this?

Image: ABC Family