If you're like me and thought there was no such thing as too much sex, there are three couples who might disagree with you. I've always been under the impression that the answer to how much sex you should be having is ALL OF IT, but these couples underwent a 30-day sex challenge for BuzzFeed and they barely made it out the other side. Although some were more successful than others, they all found it very challenging at one point or another.
The challenge was to have sex every day for 30 days— but each couple defined sex in their own way, in terms of whether there had to be penetration, climaxing, etc. to constitute sex. There was also a sexologist to help guide them through, although on the video it looks a little bit more like she irritated them.
Part of me wants to be like "Sex every day that sounds so amazing and easy!" but I'm also aware I've never lived with a partner, so even though I have sex multiple times a day, that's only the days I'm with my partner— so maybe it would be very different if it was a daily routine. Also, just setting it as "challenge" seemed to have a huge affect on how the couples viewed sex, it turns something fun into an obligation.
It's really entertaining and kind of fascinating, you can check out the whole video here:
Here were my highlights:
Right before we got into the proper video there was a preview, including this guy acting out how his "penis wanted to retreat inside of my body". Good. Sounds fun — exactly how you want your sex to be. Losing penises.
You get to meet the couples and get an idea of their sexual background — this couple has sex about five times a week so I already like them.
Then This Happened
This couple joked and debated whether they had sex "once a month" or two to three times a week but honestly I wasn't really paying attention because I was trying to take in this whole glasses situation that was happening. I have never felt less hip.
Setting The Rules
Like I said, they all had different rules. Some thought they both have to climax, some thought only one person did.
Dr. Ava Cadell appeared to explain some of the benefits of having sex every day, like having intimate communication and feeling desired— both of which sound great to me.
Already Getting Hard
Day four and she's already struggling because she was asleep and "he woke me up and we had to have sex." Had to have sex?! It's already had to have sex?! But look at how she is when she's eating the banana. It's only day four and she's nothing but a pile of banana and woe.
Day seven and they are "pretty sick of this" and "definitely don't want to bone." They certainly look both of those things.
The First Fall
It's only day eight and this couple already had their first slip up, and she genuinely seems really down about it. Things are not going well.
The sexologist tried to explain that it wasn't a problem she had stopped orgasming as much because sex is the "journey not the destination." And no one has ever looked less convinced or enthusiastic than these two tired, oversexed people.
The Fun Is Gone
Even this couple, who is still plodding along at it, think that it's really difficult to get in the mood — even if sex is good while you get there— and it's taking something great and turning it "into a chore."
He very honestly explained, "I feel like my dick is gonna fall off," while she thinks "it's a scheduling nightmare." I have to say, the dick falling off sounds worse.
Day 26 and we have an amazing turn around. This couple is "back on board" and can't believe they ever doubted it. They are loving it.
Not For Everyone
Not everyone bounced back so well. He is really struggling and would not "recommend this at all."
While one couple said they loved the challenge and would keep having more sex (though not every day) the other two found things like scheduling and illness made it impossible and turned them into, as he describes, "a pile of laundry on top of another pile of laundry," which does not sound like anyone's sexual fantasy to me.
So maybe it's not that more sex is better, maybe it's the most that you can do before turning into a perfunctory, sexless pile of laundry is the right amount for you — and definitely not so much your penis falls off.
Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our video on sex positions for small penises: