Gwen Stefani & Eve Are Going On A Tour That Has To Be As Epic As Their Previous Collaborations
This should definitely blow your mind: on Monday morning the Powers That Be delivered the good news that Gwen Stefani is going on tour with Eve, her special guest, dear friend, and two-time co-collaborator. And, if you ask me, the reunion is long overdue. In fact, when the former took to Twitter to release the dates for the This Is What The Truth Feels Like tour (god, that's a mouthful), I couldn't help but get a little psyched. Though time and tabloids have softened the former Voice coach, I'm hoping that Eve can bring Gwen back to her true form: an ab-baring bastion of badass...ness.
Stefani existed as a light in the cultural dark ages that are the early 2000s, and Eve helped fire it up. The duo first joined forces for Eve's "Let Me Blow Your Mind" track in 2001, definitely a top pick off Now That's What I Call Music 7. The music video solidified Gwen and Eve as a fearsome tag team waaaay before Lady Gaga and Beyoncé started breaking the law in "Telephone" (or whatever the more-modern equivalent of that is, I am a grandma). Fast forward to 2004, when Eve guest stars on "Rich Girl" off the retrospectively side-eye worthy album, Love Angel Music Baby. The girls get into some serious swashbuckling adventures in the music video for that gem. It's great. It's all great.
So in case you can't properly visualize how amazing their return is going to be, I think this is what we should expect from the upcoming Gwen and Eve tour, based on their previous collabs.
1. Free Cars Abandoned In The Middle Of Nowhere
Sometimes Gwen just kind of leaves them around.
2. A Quadricycle Gang
I mean, there are some motorbikes there, but Eve is definitely rocking a four-wheeler.
3. The Most Egregious Of Fashion Faux Pauxs
Gwen is wearing her thong strings right on her hips, while Eve is donning some headwear that screams "M'LADY" even in gif form.
4. Eve's Bartending Prowess
She's definitely going to be serving up shots to you, you're not going to have to spend $18 for a beer or anything.
5. All This Cultural Melding
I anticipate that the tuxedo-wearing portion of Gwen and Eve's fanbase will all be present at these shows.
6. No Bras! No Bras For Anyone!
Just string bikinis and tons of torso for everyone.
7. Bratz Dolls That Look Like Our Lovely Ladies
Subtitles not included.
8. Gwen Swinging On A Gigantic Anchor
So, you know, watch out for that.
9. Maybe Not This...?
Yeesh, let's leave the Harajuku Girls stuff to 2004, OK? It was barely acceptable then.
10. A Pirate Dance Club
If there aren't any battling ships on stage, I'll want my money back.
11. All Of These Finely Chiseled Background Dancers
And whatever baby oil they're using, I hope.
12. Oh, And Basically Everything That's In Gwen's Hair Over Here
It's like treasures I've never seen before.
Suffice to say Gwen and Eve are definitely going to bring it. Make sure to check out the full tour date list here and snag your tickets ASAP!
Images: YouTube (12)