Entertainment

Today's Kids Would Never Understand These Shows

by Mary Grace Garis

The true ‘90s kids aren’t really having kids (OK, I’m not, I can barely cook mac and cheese without burning it) but that doesn’t mean we’re not decidedly old. In fact, controversial opinion: ‘90s kids aren’t kids at all right now, they are ’90s grown-ups. No, there’s a whole other generation of little ones out there, making us feel old, born after the Backstreet Boys got big and clinging to One Direction like they even compare. These kids (2010s kids?) couldn’t possibly understand the TV shows of our childhood... in more ways than one.

Maybe it has something to do with the sheer datedness of, oh, 90 percent of ‘90s shows. While cartoons can sometimes age well (partially by virtue of never aging), live-action entrees have a far harder time looking 2016 ready. Or sometimes it might just be a flaw in the concept. If kids these days are a lot less patient and possibly more jaded than you or I were, would they sit through the brain-teasing whirlwind of game shows like Legend of the Hidden Temple ? I mean, here’s hoping since a movie reboot is in the works.

In any case, these are just a few old school shows that ‘10s kids just wouldn’t get.

1. Figure It Out

You think kids of today would actually sit through wonky clues to figure out what someone's special talent is? No, this is the FGI generation.

2. Animaniacs

It's just so reliant on the pop culture references of it's... which, truth be told, we didn't even get.

3. The Adventures of Pete And Pete

I've said it before and I'll say it again: that theme song is the most '90s theme song of all time. Suffice to say, I don't think kids today will ever be able to appreciate the genius of Danny Tamborelli... and the 14 Nickelodeon shows he was on.

4. Reboot

Good luck selling these archaic graphics in a post-Frozen world. Speaking of which...

5. Sonic The Hedgehog

I mean, it wouldn't be an impossible sell, I don't think the Sonic franchise has died out entirely at this point. I just feel as though the vintage '90s Sonic series wouldn't have the same impact on a generation of kids born after the death of Sega.

6. The Secret World Of Alex Mack

Somewhere between the dollar store special effects and the insane amount of plaid flannels, this would just baffle.

7. Boy Meets World

They know Cory and Topanga as parents, so that alone would make this pretty jarring.

8. Clarissa Explains It All

All the retina-burning outfits topped with scrunchies? Yeah, not super "in" these days.

9. Saved By The Bell

Ok, look. Saved By The Bell is an objectively garbage TV show that we all appreciate mainly for nostalgia reasons. These kids would be confused about that weird brick that Zack talks into and just go from there.

10. Ghostwriter

Just... everything about this ghost-helps-solve mysteries thing, especially using a Windows 95 desktop.

11. All That

Aside from the usual issue of dated references and guest stars, I don't see a mini-Saturday Night Live on television these days. That genre sort of died with The Amanda Show, because nothing gold can stay.

Images: NBC (1); Giphy (11)