Zach Braff Slams 'Bachelor' Juan Pablo With Amusingly Ironic Insults
Here's how to confirm if you are legitimately a douchebag: if someone who is universally thought of as obnoxious tells the Internet that you're a douchebag, you're a douchebag. In a perfect example of this, Zach Braff tweeted that Bachelor Juan Pablo Galavis is a douche.
Now, this is not a revelation whatsoever. Anyone who has watched The Bachelor in its eighteenth season or even had an eye open to social media for the past two months knows that, yes, Juan Pablo Galavis is indeed a homophobic, self-important, thinks-with-the-dick kinda guy who has a hard time understanding that he should listen sometimes. The entire season, which ended on Monday, was quite possibly the most controversial season the series has ever had, so Braff's tweets are…well….zeitgeisty and relevant, to say the least.
In a pretty on-point tweet, he said, "Bachelor goes on a douchey show, acts like douche, is now mad people think he's a douche. #confused."
That's valid. The Bachelor certainly calls for some chauvinism and misogyny — it breeds upon that! Braff also tweeted this call-out: "Missed the end of the Bachelor. Did they all get tested? #dirtydick." Some classic man-slut shaming right there, ya know.
Obviously Braff has a point, but what we're really dealing with here is, pardon the cliche, the pot calling the kettle black.
There are various types of d-bags, but when you attempt to raise over $3 million on Kickstarter for a project when you're already loaded, when Kickstarter is designed to raise funds for projects that might not be otherwise funded, you could be called a d-bag. Or when you freak out on a kid on Punk'd, you could be called a d-bag.
Which is to say, Braff knows a d-bag when he sees one, seeing as he's been called one once or twice or a million times in his past. So, since Braff has called out JP, it looks like Juan Pablo has passed the d-bag test. Congrats, Mr. Galavis! Hey, at least you succeed in something.