9 Harsh Realities Of Using Dating Apps

I'm really ambivalent about dating apps. I don't like how they make us look or treat people — and I certainly found they made me behave in a worse way than I ever would in person. But I live in a big city and it's hard to meet people. I met my girlfriend on Tinder and we've been happily dating for over a year now, which is a massive plus in my book. But it seems the "Dating Apocalypse" is really here. 

Or at least, according to dating app Hinge it is. If you head over to thedatingapocalypse.com, they'll give you a whole list of depressing facts about dating apps from internal surveys and other research — and some creepy, abandoned circus music to set the mood. But some of the stats aren't so bad. I mean, the fact that 90 percent of Hinge users said they're using swipe apps when they're bored isn't going to come as a massive surprise to anyone, right? It's one of the best things to do when you're bored. 

Some of the findings were downright terrifying though, like the fact that one academic report found that "Tinder's hypnotic allure borrows from the same psychological process that addictively draws people to play slot machines." Yikes. The good news is that Hinge is promising something better and the whole point of the website is to give you an opportunity to send your email and sign up for it. What "it" is, we don't know yet, but from everything they're saying it'll be an anecdote to the swipe culture.

Still, it's always good to know what's going on and how people are actually feeling about these apps, so here are some of the cold, hard truths about using dating apps.

1. Only 1 in 500 Swipes On Hinge Results In An Exchange Of Phone Numbers

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So, that's not great. I'm a big fan of getting to an actual,  in real life date as soon as possible — so let's get those numbers out there, people. 

2. Nearly A Third Of Hinge Users Go On App Dates Assuming It Won't Work Out

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Then why even go? Positive mental attitude.  

3. 75 Percent Of Men On Hinge Only Look At The First Photo

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That's their own fault, because three photos in is where I had me trying to pour whiskey into a sock monkey's mouth and they should have seen that before agreeing to go out with me. 

4. 81 Percent Of Hinge Users Have Never Found A Long-Term Relationship On ANY Swiping App

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I knew that long-term relationships aren't the norm on dating apps, but I have to say that I was surprised to see how high this number was. That means that fewer than one in five users have had long-term relationships out of apps. 

5. 22 Percent Of Men On Hinge Have Used A Swiping App While On A Date

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Come on guys, are you serious? It's bad enough when a Tinder notification pops up when you're on a date. It's way worse when you're actually on the app. Put it away for two hours, OK? 

6. Most Of Hinge Users Feel Lonely After Swiping

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54 percent of us, in fact. Which isn't that reassuring. Aren't they supposed to optimistic — like, "Look at all the possibilities out there!" rather than depressing and lonely?

7. 30 Percent Of Women On The Leading Dating App Have Been Lied To About A Match's Relationship Status

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Unfortunately this isn't surprising, considering all of the press about married people on Tinder and other dating apps, but it's still not great if you're looking for a long-term relationship or just a hookup that's not hurting anyone. 

8. Most Of Us Have Lowered Our Standards On Dating Apps

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I don't know anyone who's lowered their standards, it's more that they get into some kind of weird swiping trance and think, "Oh, hey, why not?" until they they match with that person and aren't interested. It's one of the reasons I think there we have so many matches that end up not going anywhere

9. 37 Percent Of Men Have Been Catfished On The Leading Dating App

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I think this happens to men more than women, and I can only hope they are those really obvious bots so you don't end up sucked in for a date... or your credit card details.

I know these stats aren't great and maybe Hinge really will offer something better. But people do end up married or in relationships through dating apps — it's not all bad. Just be sure to use dating apps wisely, and get out of the swiping and into some real life contact. 

Images: Andrew Zaeh for Bustle; Giphy (9)

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