John Oliver Has Had Enough of This Email Scandal

Like most of us, John Oliver thought we'd finally finished talking about Hillary Clinton's email drama in July when the FBI concluded that Clinton, while careless, hadn't broken the law with ill intentions. Well, the scandal is back in full force after FBI Director James Comey's vague letter to Congress, and John Oliver is really, really not happy about it.

After playing a clip of CNN's Wolf Blizter breaking the news, Oliver is already prepared to reach for a bottle of rum. "Oh perfect!" he says. "That's just what this election and everyone's state of mind needed. Bacardi should really consider switching their slogan to, 'Bacardi: Because There Might Be More F*cking Clinton Emails.'" I think most of us can relate to this sentiment.

Adding to Oliver's distaste for this development is the involvement of serial sexter Anthony Weiner. Another political fiasco we all were happy to think we'd left behind. Now, on top of having to talk about this never-ending Clinton email saga, we have to deal with the resurgence of "Weiner" jokes, the sharing of Weiner's crotch pictures, and discussions about his possible sexting with minors. Nobody needed this, including Vice President Joe Biden.

As bad as all of this is, possibly the most irritating part of our return to Emailgate is the real possibility of the new probe yielding nothing significant or having anything to do with Clinton. Comey has been strongly criticized for getting ahead of himself in his decision to write the letter Congress. Not only did the FBI still not have a warrant to investigate the new emails, but, according to one government officials, Comey "had no idea what was in the content."

"OK, so nine days out from the election," Oliver says in his segment, "the FBI has basically delivered us the equivalent of a mystery box, and like the box from the end of Se7en, it could contain anything from nothing to Gwyneth Paltrow's head. Although it most definitely contains Anthony Weiner's penis. And the chances of getting this result before the election seem slim."

This last point has been suggested by Comey himself, who's stated, "I cannot predict how long it will take us to complete this additional work." Considering that there are apparently thousands of emails to review in the laptop containing said messages, the chances of a finished probe before Election Day are highly unlikely.

"So, to recap," says Oliver, "the grinding hell of this election has thrown in yet another twist, with the election potentially hanging in the balance all thanks to the fact Anthony Weiner allegedly sexted with a 15-year-old girl."

Thanks a lot, Weiner.