Kelly Clarkson Was Angry About Her 'Hamilton Mixtape' Song & Her Passion Made It Even Better

There are plenty of things I think of when I hear Kelly Clarkson's Hamilton Mixtape cover of "It's Quiet Uptown." Like, oh, I don't know, sadness, despair, strife, gut wrenching pain, awe, and a bit of "YAS QUEEN," if that counts as an emotion. Perhaps the only negative emotion I did not feel while listening and sobbing gently was that of fury. But the actual singer of said song, apparently, cannot say the same. According to Entertainment Weekly, Clarkson was "angry" that she was asked to sing, "It's Quiet Uptown" for the Hamilton Mixtape. And it's that probably that very passion that ended up making the cover so profound.

You see, she wasn't actually offended by being asked to sing on the Hamilton Mixtape. She's not crazy, you guys. There's a perfectly good explanation as to why she questioned the audacity of being asked, as EW relays, by Atlantic Records chairman and CEO, Craig Kallman. She revealed that,

I sent an email back to him with a lot of expletives. I was so angry, because I was pregnant with my son, and it’s all about their son dying. I was a complete mess, but I was like, 'It’s beautiful. I’ll try and do it, but I can’t promise you I can get through the dang thing.' It was literally the hardest thing I’ve ever done in the studio.

The thing is, while poor, pregnant Clarkson had to run the gamut of depressing emotions, we reaped the benefits. As Bustle writer Mary Grace Garis previously relayed, it's a similar situation to that of her heartbreaking performances of "Piece by Piece" when she was pregnant with her daughter, River. You can hear her perceived sorrow over the situation in every note.

Because of that, I'm selfishly sort of super happy that it had to happen this way. The song, though different and updated, still packs the same punch as the original, if not with just a little something extra. Something just a little more real.

It's haunting, this cover. It's a song that sticks with you long after you've stopped listening, and that's because you can feel it. In her wavering voice, in the heavy tone, and in the sentimental power behind the notes. If you don't get goosebumps, it's because you aren't listening close enough.