Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin's Luxurious Vacation Makes Us Want to Consciously Uncouple, Too — PHOTOS
So this is how you consciously uncouple in style and in luxury! You've got take a look at the luxury beach resort that Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin have snuck away to. It will make you want to consciously uncouple, too! But hey — when you've got a luxury beach house, break ups suddenly seem a lot easier, do they not?
We've waxed and waned over the term "conscious uncoupling" since the couple split — er, uncoupled, I mean — last week, and how it was sort of odd that they went on vacation together, but this beach house definitely redefines and shapes the term. As GOOPy as the term was (eat a bag of kale! Go on vacation! Be happy and detox and go on a vacation with your ex-husband while you're at it), this takes the concept to a whole new level...a level of luxury. This is definitely the break-up resort of the woman who said that famous folks have it harder than women with 9-to-5 jobs do. I'll raise a flag here: most women who work in offices don't have this sort of situation easily accessible when they reach a sad point in their lives. We say, "hand me the chocolate and wine!"
But, for the love of Gwynnie, why cry alone in your room when you can cry in this beach resort in Eleuthera?
Oh, yeah — because it's $1,500 a night with a three night minimum if you're renting during peak season (November 1 to May 31) — which is now. But wait! It's $10,500 for a week! Just over ten grand!
It's got three pavilions, four bedrooms and five bathrooms because some people need two bathrooms when they're stressed out, you know? It overlooks the Atlantic Ocean, and it's got a deck, a gazebo, a balcony, and grill, two kayaks and is essentially your own personal Club Med without those weird shows at night. It's perfect for all of your average conscious uncoupling needs!
Take a look at these pics: We've got this delightful view, which is perfect for not crying over your uncoupling. Who knew separating could be so gosh darn relaxing! I want an uncoupling now!
We've also got this bedroom, perfect for a not-marital bed. Lest we forget, this is only one of four bedrooms. This very well may be the room for the probable servant for all that we know.
And then there's this breathtaking room. Hey, if you can't have a marriage, you can have this.
Welp, conscious uncoupling sure looks good from the outside. But isn't that the point? Show the world you're the equivalent of raw kale for breakfast as you fall apart like a crumbling Dorito on the inside?