Feel that chill in the air? That's actually me exhaling every time I remember the tenth season of The Bachelorette will premiere next Monday. I'm stoked, sure, but I'm still reeling from Juan Pablo Galavis's bonkers Bachelor season. I must admit, I'm having some anxiety about jumping back into the fold. (Am I ready? Will I ever be ready? Does my being ready matter? Can someone get Chris Harrison on the line?) Do you know what else gives me ice breath? Photoshop fails. Erin Gloria Ryan at Jezebel noticed something a bit off about a new Bachelorette promo: Andi Dorfman’s right shoulder has been photoshopped out entirely. Like, a decent portion of her upper body is missing. Why was it edited out? I couldn't tell you for certain. Maybe she had a brutal farmer's tan?
Though her shoulder is gone, she does have both hands. Oh wait. Upon further inspection, I'm not convinced those paws are not disembodied hands suspended by fishing wire. All of it is very weird, and I cannot stop staring.
(Side note: I must say, I love that the network is holding onto the Juan puns as long as they can. Puns are a beautiful thing. Bless you, ABC. Never change.)
I wrote a poem for the M.I.A. shoulder:
"Hey, Shoulder? Come Back"
The cold shoulderA shoulder to cry onShoulder the blameThese are things you cannot do, AndiWith your right shoulder in this pic, AndiBecause it IsGone
Andi, oh Andi!Where did your shoulder go?Andi, oh Andi!Why was it photoshopped out like so?Andi, oh Andi!Ees okay, we'll make this workAndi, oh Andi!I'm sorry if my saying "ees okay" made you go berserk
Andi is not looking for the JuanAndi is not looking for the oneAndi is looking for the armThe shoulder and the arm
I will accept snaps in lieu of applause.