Life

These Are the Worst States to Find a Decent Guy

Playing the field and on the lookout for the perfect match? What you find may depend on the state you live in. And if you live in one of these 10 states... well, you may be out of luck. I'm sorry. I am so, so sorry.

Background check website DirtSearch.org combed through their records to narrow down the absolute worst states to find a decent (read: non-criminal) guy. They examined some 1.5 million searches for info about crimes ranging from petty theft and writing bad checks to fraud and other, harder criminal charges. The results brought back some good news for women who live Wisconsin, Seattle, and Portland — congratulations! Your states are the ones in which you’re most likely to find an upstanding gentleman! — but some bad news for a whole lot of others. According to the dirt on DirtSearch, the top 10 worst states to find a decent guy are:

  1. California
  2. Florida
  3. Texas
  4. Arizona
  5. New York
  6. Pennsylvania
  7. Illinois
  8. Ohio
  9. Michigan
  10. North Carolina

Why is it that these states seem to be awash in less-than-stellar background checks? DirtSearch.org speculates that it might have something to do with how densely populated they are; the site states in a press release, “In denser populated states, it is often harder to meet that quality person because there are too many men that you have to sift through to find [him].” I’m not sure whether there’s any truth to that, but I suppose it could be possible.

Of course, what this listing doesn’t take into account are the kinds of bad news dudes whose awfulness doesn’t show up on paper: Maybe they’ve gaslit all their previous partners, are serial cheaters, wear cargo shorts, etc. Also, let’s not forget that women can be terrible, too; the data presented here is limited to men, but being a scumbag extends to both genders.

Identifying the red flags early on will help limit your exposure to terrible dates, so be on the lookout for things like manipulative tendencies and whether he hates your family and all your friends; I’m also of the opinion that one of the best ways to get the measure of a person is to watch how he or she interacts with waiters and bartenders. If (s)he is fabulously awesome to you, but a complete dick to servers, you probably don’t want to waste any more time on him/her. Just, y’know… a heads up. But hey, if your chosen partner displays any of these 25 signs from LovePanky, you’re in luck — you’ve got a keeper!