'Fault in Our Stars' Bench Stolen Off the Street, So What Did the Thieves Do With It?
The real question is, does this make The Fault in Our Stars fans better or worse than the craziest Twilight fan? That's for you to decide. So far, TFIOS is one of the most profitable movies of 2014 and that reign shows no sign of slowing down anytime soon. Why would it? TFIOS has everything you need from a story: life lessons, a beautiful romance, poignant emotion, and Shailene Woodley. Plus, TFIOS made Colton Haynes cry, which is still hilarious. However, it appears that TFIOS inspired another action: grand theft bench. Yes, that's right, the Amsterdam bench from TFIOS has been stolen right off the street and no one noticed for a whole month.
Everyone who went to go and see the movie remembers that iconic street bench upon which Hazel Grace Lancaster and Augustus Waters sat and reaffirmed their love for each other and then made out like, well, teenagers in love. Anyone who was planning a trip to the Leidsdegracht to see it, however, had better try and get their money back. The bench has been replaced with a large flower pot, which accounts for why no one noticed it missing for a month. Suspects range from the city itself removing the bench for repairs to devoted TFIOS fans who were in the mood to steal a bench rather than emulate the casts' wardrobes or something.
What exactly were they going to do with the bench? Well, there are actually a lot of options.
1. Reenact the Scene
The most likely option for stealing the bench is to force your devoted boyfriend or girlfriend to help you memorize all of the lines spoken by Hazel and August in that iconic scene and then recreate the moment as best as you can. After all, in the heyday of Twilight, there was a story floating around about a woman who married her co-worker just because his last name was Cullen and her first name was Rosalie. This is a step down from that on the crazy scale.
2. Redecorate the House
If that sounds like too much effort, or like it might put your relationship in jeopardy, you could always use the bench to redecorate your house with. Why have chairs around the table when you could have the real-life TFIOS bench? Or maybe you could break it down into wood pieces and weld it into something you can hang on the wall. You don't have to explain why it's there to your guests. You know why it's there.
3. Turn it into a Swing
If having a dirty bench from Amsterdam in the house might raise too much unwanted attention, why not turn the bench into a porch swing? Who doesn't want a porch swing? Sure, the bench would look pretty old for a brand new, DIY porch swing, but you've got to preserve its integrity. Having it restored would ruin that. Hazel and August didn't sit on a restored bench. You guests just don't understand art.
4. Cry Over It
I've changed my mind. The most likely option for stealing the bench is so you can look at it and cry every single day until The Fault in Our Stars DVD comes out. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if the bench was returned the day after the DVD hits the shelves. After all, movie tickets are expensive so shelling out the money to go to the theater every day to have a good cry is silly. Shelling out the money for a ticket to Amsterdam to steal a bench is much, much less crazy.