Her brow is constantly furrowed, and she only stops assaulting the keys of his MacBook Pro long enough to look meditatively into the distance.
The Screenplay writer
See: The Novelist, (only with less follow-thorough).
The Hip, Religious Intellect
The hip religious intellect can be seen wearing a worn denim shirt, toting an even more weathered Bible, and stroking his inch-long beard between journal entries.
The Student losing his mind
We've all been there. The sleep-deprived student relies on a multitude of refills to keep his head above water: That is, the sea of text books adorning his table.
The Guy on His Laptop Who Thinks He's in Private
There is a time and place for these types of videos, and the coffee house is not it.
The Oblivious Person With Headphones
"Hey can I sit here?" "HEY! Can I sit here?" "HEY, CAN I SIT HERE?!" Nothing.
The Fair Trade Snob
If it isn't organically grown and handpicked by orphans in Colombia, the coffee snob is outtie.
The Guy Who's Trying to Pick You Up
Why yes, I am drinking coffee. How did you guess?
They've been sitting in those same seats since before your mama's mama was born.
The creeper exists everywhere, but this particular creeper usually wears sunglasses indoors and lingers a wee bit too long at the barista counter.
The Homeless guy
He'll offer you unwanted sage advice on the way to the bathroom. On second thought, I'll just hold it.
The Aggravated Internet User
She thinks the world is plotting against her because her computer can't hold a WiFi connection.
People on a first Date
Because what's better to soothe first date nerves than a big ol' cup of caffeine?
Moms on a baby date
Totally cool, just make sure the stroller isn't taking up my spot.
The guy Whose Drink Order Holds Up the Line
Thanks, Starbucks, for having a mere 170,000 ways to customize your drink order.
The person with no phone etiquette
That's cool, NOT LIKE I'M TRYING TO WORK OR ANYTHING.
It's just coffee, brah. No need to pull out all of the scarves.
This one's a throwaway if you live in a city like Los Angeles or Brooklyn — because really, how to differentiate — but the hipster coffee goer is quickly becoming the most cliched stereotype across America.
The coffee Instagrammer
Because we clearly need more artful photos of that flower/heart/foam blob in your latte on our feeds.
The Guy Who Claims an Entire 6-Person Table With All of His Junk
Just ... no.
Why aren't you the guy hitting on me? Oh right, because you're too busy reading this article on your laptop.