Guys, have you seen Nicki Minaj's new music video? To give you the short version of the premise, it's "Baby Got Back 2: Butts in the Jungle." Watch it at work if you're lucky enough to be in a super-secluded cubicle, but be warned of the veritable tidal wave of twerking you're signing up for. With the ubiquitous booty rockin' everywhere in Nicki Minaj's "Anaconda" video, the ever-present product placement may have gone unnoticed. Nah, just kidding. When Nicki plugs a product, she plugs it to the face. Or rather, in this case, to the bum?
This three-minute tale of rainforest workouts, twerking, and lackluster lap dances has enough subliminal messages scattered throughout to make Josie and the Pussycats look tame. After all, Nicki, Queen of the Amazon, couldn't possibly survive in her Swiss Family Robinson tree-mansion without all of her favorite products. I mean, come on people. A Barbie's gotta have her corporately sponsored creature comforts.
Pumping her workout tunes on anything less than a Dr. Dre Beats Pill is simply unsuitable. When she needs to hydrate, MateFit tea apparently keeps her little in the middle. Finally, when she's in the mood to unwind after a long day of lifting hand weights and commanding her minions to "DROP IT LOW, YOU WORMS!" she unwinds with a crisp MYX malt beverage. Let's dive into all the product placement in the "Anaconda" video, 'cause apparently, we can never be inundated with enough commercial messages.
Dr. Dre Beats Pill
So, if Nicki were stranded in a remote tropical locale, what could she simply not live without? It's not toilet paper. It's not water or food. It's premium stereo equipment, of course! Because Dr. Dre's Beats Pill literally cannot make enough music video cameos, the mini-radio pops up in "Anaconda" too. It blasts the title track as she and her girls furiously jiggle their butts on a rope bridge. Just for old time's sake, let's remember the time that the Beats Pill prominently appeared in the "Pills 'n Potions" video.
Wait a sec, so does this mean that she's talking about OD-ing on Beats Pills, and not actual pills in this song?
What's Nicki drinking here? Well, funny you should ask, it's MateFit tea, a brand of appetite-suppressing weight loss tea that doesn't conflict at all with the premium of having a big, luscious booty. As you can see, nothing encapsulates her line in this song "I ain't missing no meals" like a tea cleanse. Oh wait, just kidding, a tea cleanse is generally when you miss every meal. Mixed messages, much?
In the event that you missed the first subtle glamour shot of Minaj's "Myx Mostcato" above, the second half of the video ensures that you get the message.
Eff subtlety. The production design team wheels in three massive chrome letters spelling out the brand's name all for the sake of synergy, sweet synergy! I don't know about y'all, but I feel like my body was just crushed with MYX-brand anvil, Looney Tunes-style.
There you have it. This cheek-fest was made possible by contributions from Beats Pill, MateFit Tea, Myx Moscato, and viewers like you.
Image: Nicki Minaj Vevo/YouTube