This Maddeningly Terrible Parking Job Is Making Our Heads Explode a Little — VIDEO

If you’ve ever seen a botched parking job (which is like, every parking job in California), this video will show you what a really, truly, horribly next-level kind of bad parking job looks like. In this particular parking fail, spectators from above watch as a gray van tries to park in a relatively spacious spot for two whole minutes. Her tenacity would almost be admirable, if it ever amounted to anything.

Look, it’s okay to not be a great parker. I'm not a great parker. If I'm out and have to parallel park, I just go home. Becoming a professional parker take time, energy, and an innate sense of, uh, life and movement. But this woman clearly does not know how to use her steering wheel, and that's a little scary. Either she feels like her car is going to turn on its own, or that the car behind her is going to gradually step back and bless her with her infinite room to blindly roll in. At one point, it almost seems like she has everything under control because the only thing she has to do is reverse straight back, but ALAS. Abandon hope all ye who enter here, because reversing straight back is not happening. The driver almost collides with a parked yellow car, but stops just in time. But after another minute goes by, the driver is clearly all, “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. I’m parking this thing no matter where I end up or how many vehicles I demolish along the way. I at least deserve that right.” So she backs up in to the spot, sideswiping the yellow car. YOLO, amirite?

But the driver’s saga is not yet over. Once her car is tightly nestled against the yellow car, she tries to open her door, only to realize she has no room to get out. She somehow thinks she’ll just slide right outta there, but apparently physics is not her forte. So she has to exit using the passenger door, and while she’s squirming her way out, the car slightly moves forward. Because she didn’t turn off her car after she “parked.” Because of course she didn't. After she has makes sure her vehicle isn’t going anywhere, the woman gets out of the car, clearly flustered, and whacks the yellow car she smashed into. Because how dare you exist when I’m trying to park.

Image: Getty Images