"Everybody Wanna Steal My Nom"

I was downright elated when I read about the Grammy nominations this year. My girls Miley Cyrus, Ariana Grande, and Katy Perry all got nominated, and I'm so happy that my favorite ladies are getting critical acclaim along with their commercial success. This was until I realized who was missing from the list. Where are the princes of pop music? How is it possible that One Direction is not nominated for a Grammy for Best Pop Vocal Album or Record of the Year? Total blasphemy. This is so not OK. Midnight Memories is a great album. I have been listening to One Direction music all morning in my own peaceful protest.

Then I thought about it more... If I am this outraged by the snub, I cannot even imagine how the members of One Direction feel right now. I mean, if I had one of the most successful albums of the year, I would be expecting some love from the Grammy Awards. Or I would at least be hoping for it.

I don't know what I would do without One Direction and their catchy songs. They have been there for me during workouts, pre-games, car rides, parties, heart break. I could go on and on with that list. If you name a situation, I'll give you a One Direction song that can get you through it. I feel bad for the guys. I want to be there for them like they have been there for me, and I cannot think of a better way to do that than through their own music. I have reworked some of their song lyrics to help the boys get through being left out of the Grammy nominations.

"What Makes You Beautiful"

You're insecure. Don't know what for. You're turning heads when you walk through the door. Don't need a nom, to cover up, being the way that you are is enough.

"Gotta Be You"

Can we try one more time? Stop the tape and rewind. Oh, and if you don't nominate, I know I'll fade. 'Cause there is no other award show.

"One Thing"

So get out, get out, get out of my head and fall into my arms instead. I don't, I don't, don't know what it is, but I need that one Grammy. And you've got that one nom.

"More Than This"

If I'm louder, would you see me? Would you lay a Grammy in my arms and rescue me? 'Cause we are the same. You save me. When you snub it's gone again.

"Live While We're Young"

Hey Grammys, I'm waiting on ya, I'm waiting on ya. Come on and let me sneak a nom. And have a celebration, a celebration. The music up, the windows down. Yeah we'll be doing what we do. Pretending that we're cool and nominated too. Yeah, we'll keep doing what we do. Just pretending that we're cool.

"Kiss You"

Oh Grammy Awards, don't you know you got what I need? Looking so good from your noms to victory. Oh, I just wanna show you off to all of my friends. Make 5SOS drool down to their chinny-chin-chins. Grammy, be mine tonight, mine tonight. Grammy, be mine tonight, yeah.

"Best Song Ever"

And we danced all night to the best song ever. We knew every line. Now I can't remember how we got no noms but I wont forget it. 'Cause we danced all night to the best song ever.

"Story of My Life"

Written in these noms, are the awards that I can't receive. I leave my album open, but it stays right here empty. Grammys told me in the morning it don't feel the same about us with these snubs. It seems to me that when I die these snubs will be written on my stone.

"Midnight Memories"

Straight off the plane to a new hotel. Just got snubbed, you could never tell. Big nominations for stars that glisten. People talk shh but we don't listen. Tell me that I'm wrong but I do what I please. Way too many people nominated but me. Now I'm at the age, when I know what I need, oh, nom.

"You & I"

I figured it out. I figured it out from snub to nom. Singles and albums, maybe they had to take some time. I know how it goes. I know how it goes from snub to nom. Silence and sound. Did they ever snub others like us? Did they ever fight like us?

"Steal My Girl"

Grammy be my queen since we were 16. We want the same noms. We dream the same wins. Alright. I got it all 'but a nom. AMAs give me noms. VMAs give me noms. Alright. I know, I know, I know for sure. Everybody wanna steal my nom. Everybody wanna talk my Gram away. Couple Grammy's in the whole wide show. Find another one 'cause noms belong to me.