Relationships are all fun and games until, well, they aren’t. Sometimes you turn to others for advice. How do you keep a marriage strong? Why do I keep falling for jerks? Even if you’d like to deny it, you may have found yourself wandering through the self-help section of Barnes & Noble on occasion. It’s okay, we’ve all been there.
Everyone’s got it — relationship advice, that is. Even if you don’t want it, people are offering it up left and right. From your best friend who tells you never to call a guy after the first date, to the cashier at your local grocery store sharing strategies for keeping her relationship strong. Some of the advice you will receive will be on point and others will miss the mark. It’s hard to know what will work for your love life and what advice to throw out with last season’s shoes.
That being said, here are some pieces of advice you can ignore, along with your annoying ex-boyfriend that keeps calling you.
Never Go To Sleep Angry
You can throw this old relationship advice out with yesterday’s junk mail. The idea that you and your partner should never go to sleep upset at each other is outdated and nearly impossible. There will be times you two are upset with one another, and that’s okay. You don’t need to rush making things “nice” again just because it’s bedtime. Sometimes a little sleep can do a body good, and a relationship.
Love Doesn’t Happen When You’re Looking For It
Tell this to the millions of people online dating. Who even started telling this lie? This statement is not only annoying, but it’s infuriating to the people in the world who are actually looking for love. Just because a person is open and ready to find his or her match means that it won’t happen? I’m calling bullshit on this one.
Wait Three Dates To Have Sex
Planning on when to have sex based on the number of dates is just plain baloney. Dating is not a game where one plus one equals two. There’s no exact science. Having sex shouldn’t be contingent on how many times you’ve seen your date. It should be whenever you WANT to. Whether that’s the first date or the fifteenth, it’s your decision to make for yourself.
Love Is All You Need
Sure, love is crucial in a happy and successful relationship. But having the idea that love is all you need is semi-ridiculous. Have people forgotten about respect, trust, loyalty, etc? Love doesn’t conquer all. It’s one of the main ingredients in a partnership, but to say that’s all you need is misguided. The recipe includes much more and without the other ingredients, the finished product won’t come out just right.
Couples Shouldn’t Argue
I’m not saying couples should be down each other’s throats every single night but it’s normal to have some arguments here and there. Couples that don’t fight at all probably aren’t truly communicating. It’s healthy to have arguments because it means you and your partner are talking things through. You are molding two lives into one, so there are bound to be some moments of tension. Embrace it in a healthy way.
Everyone Deserves A Second Chance
The only people that say this are probably the ones that want a second chance. Sure, some people deserve another chance. But, to say everyone does is absurd. You have the right to decide that for yourself. Sorry, I’m not sorry to all the cheaters, wrong-doers and the name-callers.
The Best Way To Get Over Someone Is To Get Under Someone
Indicating that the best way to get over a previous lover is to have sex with a new person is foolish. Sex can be a fun distraction in the moment, but it’s only temporary. Getting down with someone new won’t help you in the long run. You need to deal with your emotions about your previous partner before moving forward. The best way to get over someone is to actually do the work of getting over that person.
If Your Partner Is Jealous It Means He/She Loves You
Feelings of jealously in a relationship can be normal, but acting on that jealousy is another story. One that reads like a final chapter. If your partner is looking through your phone, that doesn’t mean he or she just loves you so much, it means he or she has trust issues. It’s speaking to a bigger issue within the relationship.
Images: Gabriel Li/Flickr