Which Girls character would Taylor Swift be? If you guessed Shoshanna, you're wrong. Recently Lena Dunham and the cast of Girls were asked by People magazine who T. Swift is most like, and they all agreed that Taylor Swift is totally a Marnie. But like, "who Marnie wishes she was," Dunham qualified.
Taylor Swift herself has said she's a Shoshanna, but Dunham disagrees, as does the rest of the cast. "I think she feels she's a Shosh because she likes to have things in their proper order and she has a certain positivity about the world," Dunham said. "I would almost argue ... she's like Marnie's aspiration." Allison Williams, who plays Marnie, agreed. "[She's] Marnie's most realized version of herself."
Poor Marnie's gotten a bad rap for being one of "the worst characters on TV" alongside people like Joffrey from Game of Thrones. But there is something there behind her desperate-to-be-perfect exterior. And perhaps if she channeled a little more T. Swift, she'd be less hated.
But what would the most realized version of Marnie look like? What if Taylor Swift was on Girls instead of Marnie? Here's how I'd imagine replacing Marnie with T. Swift would do to the show.
She'd Write Songs About Charlie
The best way to get over someone is to turn them into a song.
She Never Would Have Called Hannah a Bad Friend
Taylor Swift is best friends with about 800 people, so if she and Hannah did ever fight she'd just go hang out with someone else for a little while until she and Hannah worked things out.
She'd Post More YouTube Videos
Instead of wallowing over that bad Edie Brickell YouTube video Charlie put up, Swift would just make some more videos that better showcased her talent. Or she'd video blog about her life or something. But she'd be more proactive about it than Marnie was. You gotta shake it off, baby.
She'd Still Plan Hannah a 25th Birthday Party
But it would be a quaint dinner party. Obvi.
She'd Replace Charlie with a Cat
After they break up in Season 3, Marnie gets a new apartment. Swift would probably just fill that Charlie void with a cat. Or two. Who needs boys?
She Would Never Sing a Kanye West Song
Kanye and T. Swift have a rough history. Almost as rough as this entire scene was in Girls.
She'd Still Worry About Where Her Life Was Going to End Up
But these days she'd also just try to enjoy the ride, and Marnie should too.
Here's hoping one day the two ladies get to meet on an episode of Girls so Marnie can have a positive role model and T. Swift can hang with Shosh and the gang.
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