I am not someone who likes surprises. I like when my life is predictable, and that's how I like my TV shows, too — which is probably part of the reason I'm obsessed with everything Bachelor. There are always roses, Fantasy Suite dates, and hometown dates. There are always 20-30 women or men who will always cry, cause drama, and threaten to leave. Chris Harrison will always, always, always tell us that the upcoming season or episode is "like nothing we've ever seen before." And when deciding who's to be the next Bachelor or Bachelorette, ABC usually chooses from the pool of contestants from the most recent season. However, I'd be totally willing to give up that part of the predictability of the show if they decided to change things up for once: I think a celebrity season of The Bachelorette is in order, and I have plenty of suggestions for who would be perfect for the part.
Because really: Wouldn't we root so much harder for someone who we're already mega familiar with? That could only mean amazing ratings for ABC, and some seriously good entertainment for the rest of us. Everybody wins, right? And we get to see one of our favorite celebs fall in love, an area of life that famous people are notoriously private about, so naturally, we are all extra curious about it. How has this not happened yet?!
ABC, if you're reading this, here's who you should contact first if you agree that my idea is brilliant:
Swift says she isn't interested in finding love unless it's the absolute right person
, because she doesn't want to give up her treasured singledom for the wrong person. Personally, I think Swift needs a total nobody — someone who is plucked out of obscurity and who isn't
a fellow musician or actor. And, as a bonus, she'd immediately know who to eliminate as soon as they began to talk, because the guys who couldn't resist saying anything
about her possibly writing a song about them in the future would instantly mark themselves as duds.
Since we already know Kendrick watches The Bachelor
, I can't see why she wouldn't agree to stepping into the spotlight herself. Between her charm and her down-to-earth sense of humor, we'd have a season that would be a mixture of fart jokes and real, meaningful conversation. With Kendrick, it would get so
real so fast, and if at the end she didn't want to marry either of her frontrunners, she'd totally refuse to propose to either of them.
Ready for the funniest season of The Bachelorette ever? Jennifer Lawrence would give it to us — after I convince her to ditch Chris Martin, of course. Undoubtedly, ABC would plan a Hunger Games-themed date, which would be cheesy but wonderful all at the same time. The only downside: The "I volunteer as tribute" jokes from the men would get old quick.
Rihanna's personality alone would give us the best season ever. She's not afraid to speak her mind, and she's outgoing enough that I think she'd love being the Bachelorette. If she and Leonardo DiCaprio aren't a thing, ABC should get the contract set up ASAP.
Being that Kaling is both adorable and single, she'd be a perfect fit. And if her dating habits are anything like Mindy Lahiri's on The Mindy Project, she would be the most relatable Bachelorette in history. Can you imagine her during a rose ceremony? I feel like she'd cry having to disappoint people and by the end would make Chris Harrison do it for her.
The internet can't shut up about how the oldest Duggar daughter from 19 Kids and Counting
isn't married yet at 25, so maybe Jana on Bachelorette
would quiet everyone down. She could have a pool of 20 or so guys who are all Jim Bob approved, and then at the end, she can choose one to court. It would all be very modest and chaste, and it's not like she wouldn't always have a chaperone!
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