Dating is hard, hard work, and sometimes, it requires a team effort. Obviously, this applies to both parties in a relationship making things work — but it can also apply to meeting someone new. Having a fun, social friend with you while you are out can make it a lot easier to meet your next great date —and weed out the potential terrible ones. So knowing how to be a better wing woman is essential.
Remember that most importantly, you are there for your friend. You could do everything "right" as a wing woman but your girlfriend might still not meet Mr. or Mrs. Right that night. “Being a wing woman is a process and you can reassure her that you'll get back out there again and hit up some new spots the next time. Each time it will get easier and you'll establish a good routine and maybe some go-to spots to meet new men or women. Keep her spirits and her confidence up so she'll stay excited about the dating experience,” says Mary Stuart Deibel, Three Day Rule Matchmaker. From knowing how to be approachable (it has to do with how you're sitting!) to knowing how to read the signs (aka give them some alone time!) Follow these steps and soon all of your friends will want you to be their wing woman. Happy hunting!
1. Be Approachable
If the two of you are sitting at the bar, don't keep your chairs turned towards the bar. “This does not look inviting and [people] are less likely to approach you. Turn your chairs out to show you're open to conversation,” says Deibel. Laugh, enjoy yourselves, and remind your friend to uncross her hands so she seems approachable. Don’t be afraid to scan the room regularly to help your friend make eye contact with interesting potentials.
2. Plan Wisely
Determine the end goal of your night out. If your friend is looking for quality guys or girls that she might want to date then recommend going out on a week night. Happy hours that run from 6-8 p.m. are great spots for the after-work crowd. “Choose a location where there are a few good bars within walking distance so if you end up not liking one spot, then you can try out another one in the same night,” says Deibel. Choose a spot that has games or other interactive elements because it makes mingling easier and because men enjoy these types of activities.
3. Break The Ice
“If your girlfriend points out a guy [or gal] she thinks is cute, be proactive and strike up the conversation with him first to assess his interest. If he [or she] is not interested, you can soften the blow by telling her he [or she] is not single and protect her ego so she won't get discouraged,” says Deibel. If someone is interested, then bring them back over to where you two were sitting and introduce them. Find covert ways to compliment your friend or brag about her so they're excited to meet her.
4. Learn The Signs
If your friend starts hitting it off with someone, make yourself scarce for a few minutes to give them some time to chat. Visit the ladies room, check in with your signifiant other to give him a status update, and then make your way back over to them to join the conversation again. “You want to give them enough time alone to see if they can keep up the conversation with just the two of them. If the conversation went well, your friend will enjoy telling you the details of their solo conversation on the way home afterwards,” says Deibel.
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