Life

"The Darkest Truth About Love" Might Surprise You

by Catie Keck

Some may argue that the most fundamental experience of the human condition is our desire, on one level or another, to feel a deep and uniting connection with another person. And while you could fill the world’s libraries with work and poetry written solely on the topic of amorous pining, I’d argue that its unceremonious sister, loneliness, is the one that connects us most. This is the topic explored in a beautiful project called "The Darkest Truth About Love" by illustrators Lara Lee and Hannah Jacobs, based on a poem by writer Alain De Botton. If you watch anything today, let it be this video, which I'm confident every one of us can relate to.We know by now that “the love hormone,” oxytocin, is the stuff of dreams: a warm, feel-good-all-over high whose sobering effects are known to alleviate anxiety and depression while encouraging affection and tenderness. Its many benefits are innumerable. But we so rarely address the flip side of that coin.

According to Psychology Today, loneliness occurs regardless of the number of loved ones you’re surrounded by; it's more dependent on whether you feel truly connected with those closest to you. Additionally, loneliness distorts our perceptions of our relationships. You can feel isolated in spite of your many friends and family. Loneliness can even be as damaging as cigarette smoking, says Psychology Today, because of its physical attacks on our bodies.

So how might this look and feel?

1. We're Alone

The feeling that there's no person who's exactly right for you, that you won't ever find "the one."

2. We're Misunderstood By Those Around Us

That there's no one who truly understands the way we work, the "how" and "what" of our feelings.

3. We've Never Truly Been Loved

That we were misled by our own emotions.

4. There's Something Wrong With Us

That we don't fit the mold of personhood quite right. But the twist? Nobody else does either, and that's the best part. Take a look:

Images: Hannah Jacobs/Vimeo