Anyone hoping for a complete Full House cast reunion on the upcoming Netflix series Fuller House just got a bit of bad news: The show's executive producer Robert Boyett released a statement Friday confirming there will be no Mary-Kate or Ashley Olsen on Fuller House. We don't got it, dude! Boyett had nothing but kind words for the twins, however:
“Although Ashley and Mary-Kate will not be a part of Fuller House, I know how much Full House has meant to them and they are still very much considered family. It has been exciting to see how they have built their professional careers, and I support their choice to focus on their fashion brands and various business endeavors. I appreciate their support and good wishes towards Fuller House."
For anyone not in the know, Fuller House will focus on Candace Cameron Bure's character DJ, now a widowed mother of three, who decides to move her family in with Stephanie after her husband dies. Numerous cast members are slated to return as well — but, ever since the series was announced, rumors have been swirling about whether or not the Olsens would be involved.
While the show was designed to focus on the two sisters DJ and Stephanie, fans everywhere have been hoping that we'd get to see Michelle, for at least one episode — but, sadly, now we have to wonder how will the show explain her absence. What could she possibly be doing with her life that she never visits her widowed sister and many nieces and nephews? Whatever it is, it must be a pretty big deal, because apparently it is keeping her very, very busy.
As fans cope with the disappointment about the Olsen twins' absence, I'd like think about the things Michelle could be up to, and the ways the show could try to explain why she's not there. Here are seven things Michelle could be doing with her life:
She Could Be An Exercise Guru
If there's one thing Michelle liked doing, it was bossing people around — and it just so happens that's the exact quality you need if you want to become a famous physical trainer. Maybe Michelle doesn't see her sisters because she and Jillian Michaels are too busy being besties.
Rehab For Her Ice Cream Addiction
Addiction is a rocky road. What starts out as innocent indulgence turns into dependence, and before you know it, you're breaking into a Baskin Robbins in the middle of the night, covered in sprinkles, desperate for one more scoop.
The expositional dialogue would be amazing: "Where is Aunt Michelle, Mommy?" "Oh, sweetie, you know that ever since she fell in with those rodeo clowns we don't see much of her." "What's a rodeo clown?"
She'd be the sassiest wrestler of them all. Just imagine her taking down, like, The Rock or something, and screaming "You got it, dude!" right before the knock-out punch.
Working Off Her Debt To The Natural History Museum
You can't just break a dinosaur and walk out of the museum consequence-free, Michelle!
What started as a simple stint on a cooking competition show ended in a screaming match with Gordon Ramsay. Network bosses loved it, and immediately made her the host of her own cooking show.
Maybe she's not on any great or infamous adventure, but instead she simply doesn't want to be a part of her older sisters' hijinks anymore. Maybe she's just waiting Tables in Modesto and totally happy with her life decision. Maybe she has an Etsy store on the side.
Images: Warner Bros. Television; Giphy (7)