On my flight home from visiting my grandpa in Maryland last week, I was seated next to a middle-aged guy. He was totally normal: dad jeans, nondescript button down, thick gold band on his left ring finger, in the military. After we landed, he was on texting on his phone and because I’m hella nosy, I had no choice but to start reading over his shoulder. The first thing I spotted was a very sexy message from a woman:
“Do you recognize the dildo?” she asked.
“Yes. I think it’s been inside me,” he replied.
Lesson learned: don’t judge a book by its cover, kids.
I love sexting; I think it’s super hot. There’s something about knowing that you’re turning someone on from far away that makes the whole thing thrilling. Add in the anticipation of waiting for your virtual amor to respond and you’re at ready-to-explode levels of turned on. Oh, and of course there’s always the fact that sexting often happens when you’re in a totally inappropriate venue. Some of the hottest sexting foreplay I’ve ever had was while I was in my office and my lover was back home. Phew! I’m getting hot and bothered just thinking about it.
Sexting is, of course, majorly enhanced by the fact that we all have smartphones at the ready, waiting to snap a dick pic or a vagina shot to send over. Most of us know the best angle to turn our chests into porn star tits and guys are slowly learning how to best frame their, um, excitement for our sexting pleasure. Considering that men are generally known to be more turned on by visuals and women are generally more turned on by written erotica, sexting is like the perfect combo platter for heterosexual pairs to get each other off when they’re not in the same place.
And sexting doesn’t have to be just on the phone, in my opinion. I guess when you do it over chat or email it’s technically “cybering” but I think it’s safe for us to leave that word firmly in the first decade of the century and say that sexting covers it all.
So what are you all saying when you’re sexting away? I sourced my friends to get an inside glimpse on those private messages flying back and forth and getting you all worked up. Here’s what I found — all the names are fake but all typos and grammatical mistakes are theirs and theirs alone. Don’t judge; they had more important things to think about!
1. Alex, 26
"I miss your peen"
2. Brittany, 31
"I can't wait to have your balls in my mouth and then you deep inside me."
3. Sam, 31
"I still have scars on my arms from you, but kind of makes me want to f*ck u again"
4. Tara, 34
"Thinking about you f*cking strange pussy while I eat it"
5. Jane, 28
"I'm naked and covered in coconut oil"
6. Kate, 25
"I do have lidocaine…."
7. Jackie, 24
"Can't wait to sit on that big cock"
8. Jess, 29
A photo of my breasts
9. Mark, 31
"Are you going to put any of those pics on Tumblr?"
10. Nina, 28
"You've been working out so hard and working hard and doing a lot of emotional stuff so i think a blowjob is in order"
11. Rachel, 21
"I get wet as soon as you touch me"
12. Jack, 30
"You should ride my face when i get home"
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