Walt Disney was a childhood educator of sorts. Though you might not have noticed, when you were binge-watching The Little Mermaid as a kid, you were soaking in lessons about life, love, and femininity. Sadly, the lessons we learned from Disney movies weren't always the most positive. It was a little too much Prince talk and not enough girl power. What if we re-thought the Disney of our youth to imagine how it'd look with a feminist spin? Join me as I rewrite the iconic song "Someday My Prince Will Come" from a feminist perspective.
The Disney songs we grew up belting out (and annoying the hell out of our parents with) were a tad problematic with their focuse on all this damsel-in-distress, waiting for a prince to rescue you and make you happy nonsense. Though Disney has gotten better with the heroines of late (all hail Meredith and Elsa), the Disney classics need a bit of re-working to match our high standards of gender equality and female empowerment.
So, without further ado, I give you my very much updated and improved version of "Someday My Prince Will Come" because I am a busy woman and I don't have time to sit around and wait for a prince.
To show you exactly what we're dealing with here, let's take a glance at the original lyrics. Here is a little excerpt from "Someday My Prince Will Come":
Someday my prince will comeSomeday I will find the oneThough he's far awayHe'll find my love somedaySomeday when my dreams come trueOh please make my dreams come true
Yikes. Clearly in need of some updating, which is why I have subjected this outdated song to my lyrical prowess below.
"Someday My Gender Equality Will Come"
Someday my 25 cents will comeSomeday I'll fix the gender inequality in my incomeAnd how thrilling that moment will beWhen fair employment opportunities come to me
I'll whisper "I earned you"And steal a raise or twoI hope this isn't far awayI'll find my equality some daySome day when my dreams come true
Some day perhaps I'll find a manWho treats me as an equal and doesn't interfere with my plansAnd I might not know the moment we meetFor my heart won't be skipping a beatI'll be too busy killing it at life to yearn for a dudeBut eventually I might be won over by his supportive attitudeHe might be far away but that's okayI don't need a man for my dreams come true
Somewhere waiting for meThere's a future I'm excited to seeWhen a girl can be sexual but not be called a whoreA society with gender equality would thrill me forever
My happiness has already comeI don't put stock in finding 'the one'Though I can't sayI won't fall in love somedayI'll make my own dreams come trueI don't need you to make my dreams come true
Images: Walt Disney Pictures; Giphy (2)