Fact: Keith Mars Had the Best Dad Jokes

by Mary Grace Garis

As we reflect on the legions of great TV dads this Father's Day, I can't help but feel Keith Mars holds a permanent place as a top contender. He's a hardboiled private eye with a heart of gold and a sense of justice that landed him in financial ruin, so how can we not root for him? It makes all the sense in the world that Veronica would stand by his side considering her mom was MIA, but through all the murder mysteries and general hardships, we really have to give Keith props for bringing a sense of levity to the series. Yes, we have to recognize the greatness of Keith Mars via the very thing that highlights his dadliness: His quasi-cringeworthy, yet totally amazing dad jokes.

It's great to know where exactly Veronica gets her sense of humor from, although when it comes to her actual wit... that's a little more iffy. I mean, the whole thing about dad jokes is that subtle element of cheese. Do the following exchanges apply? Touch call, but you know how Keith feels about cheese: "I'm a fan the orange powder packet stuff."

Oof. Well, in honor of the day, enjoy some of these adorable father-daughter exchanges.

1. When He Whipped Up A Killer Meal, But Also Couldn't Keep A Secret

Keith: Almost started without you; you'd have missed my chili surprise.

Veronica: You made chili?

Keith: Surprise!

2. When He Reminisced About His Glory Days But Couldn't Keep His Facts Straight

Keith: You know what, this is important. You remember this: I used to be cool.

Veronica: When?

Keith: '77. Trans-Am, Blue Oyster Cult in the 8-track, a foxy stacked blonde riding shotgun, racing for pink slips. Aw, wait a minute, I'm thinking of a Springsteen song. Scratch everything, I was never cool.

3. When He Mocked Veronica's Observational Skills

Veronica: Going somewhere?

Keith: Oh, very good number one daughter. You might make a detective yet.

4. When He Lamented Veronica's Lack Of Normal Extra Curricular Activities

Keith: What's up, honey?

Veronica: Wallace is having a little trouble giving me a urine sample.

Keith: Can't you talk on the phone and paint your nails like other girls?

5. When He Was ALL Of Our Dads & Wasn't Having Any Of Veronica's Sass Today

Keith: Veronica!

Veronica: What?

Keith: I believe the correct response is, how can I be of service, sir?

6. When He Just HAD To Be Right

Veronica: Dad, your hooker's here.

Keith: Escort, honey.

7. And Finally, When He Used His Brilliant Private Eye Insight

Veronica: So if we're to believe this police report, Weevil left the reunion, dropped off his foxy wife and his "most changed" trophy and, still wearing his dress shirt and slacks, teamed up with the motorcycle gang he left a decade ago to harass the richest divorcée in Southern California?

Keith: Well, when you say it like that, I start to see some holes in it.

Point: Keith Mars. Never change, sir.

Images: Warner Bros. Television; Giphy (7)