We should all be asking questions during sex. “Does that feel good? Do you it like it this way? What’s your favorite position? How can I help you come?” The secret to good sex, of course, is communication! Don’t ever hesitate to ask questions during sex; it’s the only way anyone ever learns and gets better.
But. But, but, but, but, but. There are some questions that should never, ever come up during the act. Questions that make your skin crawl and your clit shrink and your balls jump right up into your body in fear. Questions that are the ultimate mood killers, the sex stoppers, the best way to ensure that you will never, ever see the person you’re with naked ever again.
Are you starting to feel uncomfortable? Are you remembering a time that you dropped one of those bombs straight down and completely exploded sexy time? Don’t feel too bad about it — we’ve all been there. In fact, questions that ruin sex are so common that I’ve compiled a list of sure showstoppers. These are the questions that should never come up if you’re planning on coming. Seriously, guys. Do. Not. Ask them.
1. You can't get the same STI twice can you?
2. Do I press this to FaceTime your dad?
3. Wait, you're on birth control right?
4. Oh shit sorry, you're awake?
5. What is that smell?
6. What would Jesus do?
7. Did you return your mom's call?
8. Can we just talk about us for a second?
9. You can't catch what you already have, right?
10. Did I tell you I got that blood test back?
11. How’s your grandma doing?
12. Does this look infected to you?
Images: Giphy (12); Luna Amanda/Flickr