Amy Schumer's 'Real Housewives' Audition Is Perf

Every time I think Amy Schumer has reached the pinnacle of awesomeness, she goes ahead and tops herself. This time Schumer has produced a Real Housewives audition tape so majestic you'll be wishing it was the real deal. Dressed in a sparkly number befitting a Real Housewives star, the comedienne rattles off the reasons she should be the next Real Housewife with her trademark dryly snarky sense of humor. When asked why she would be a good addition to the cast, Schumer says, "I'm all of those things. I'm real. I'm in the house a lot. I am not a wife, but I have had sex with a lot of married people."

She doesn't stop there. Her other qualifications including drinking wine from an adult-sized glass, coming up with killer taglines ("I don't need a man, but I want one... any one"), and her willingness to move anywhere. The Real Housewives of Secaucus, anyone? I would so watch that show. Schumer is joking — and she is crazy busy with her hit TV show Inside Amy Schumer and upcoming movie Trainwreck — but after watching her audition tape I really, really want Schumer and the The Real Housewives franchise to come together.

Schumer would make an amazing Real Housewife, and here's why:

She Finds So Much Comedic Inspiration From Her Love Life

Schumer's love life (and her general thoughts on the crazy world of dating) inspire a good bit of her comedy. She would totally have the most salacious stories to tell the Housewives — even if she made them up.

She Would Stir Up All The Trouble

Real Housewives would be nothing without screaming matches and I think Schumer's general cool factor would lead her to provoking other cast members to fight while she sat back and observed. She knows how the game is played, and she would play it well.

She Would Have The Best Talking Heads

The best part of any reality show is when you get to see the stars talk privately about their cast mates. I'm pretty sure Schumer would love the other ladies, but she would still get so much joy out of keeping a running commentary on their squabbles, love lives, and drama.

She Excels At Dramatics

Schumer has done enough reality TV parodies to make the requisite hysterics look real.

She Really Does Love Wine

An essential part of being a Real Housewife... I mean, they have to have something to throw in each other's faces.

She Would Put The "Real" In Real Housewives

How refreshing would it be to see just one really real person on The Real Housewives? Schumer is silly, outrageous, and funny, but she also drops hard truths all over the place. If she was on The Real Housewives she would totally reinvent the franchise and send it up at the same time. I think everyone can agree, that would be appointment television.

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