When Kris and Bruce Jenner announced officially announced their long-awaited separation in October, we all knew what was coming — an even crazier, more desperate Kris. The woman who turned her former last name into a brand obviously had some plans for her own image following the split, but I don't think anyone could've predicted that they would involve a former Bachelor. After weeks of rumors, it seems potentially official that 58-year-old Kris Jenner and Ben Flajnik are dating, according to Us Weekly.
The story claims that the two have been "hooking up" for a while now, and though 31-year-old Flajnik denies it, sources say otherwise. While Kris would like us to believe that the world has a new power couple, the truth is, we have two more people just barely pulling off a publicity stunt to laugh at.
At least it's been a fun fraud to watch. Between Instagram photos, high profile dates and tabloid stories, Kris and Ben, or Kren as she probably hopes we call them, have had a pretty busy month and a half. Sorry, Bruce. Let's take a look back at the progress of this genuine, non-career-fueling, romantic relationship.
July: Ben Appears on Kris
When The Bachelor host Chris Harrison co-hosted Kris's short-lived, self-titled talk show, Ben appeared as a guest to talk about his Envolve wines, and obviously, sparks flew.
Early September: A Friendly Vacation to Mexico
While both Ben and Kris were still in relationships, publicly anyway, they went on vacation to Girls Gone Wild creator/Kardashian BFF Joe Francis's house in Mexico. Now that the relationship rumors have gotten more serious, Ben wants everyone to know that he and Kris weren't alone, and his own friends and Francis were there. Yeah, still weird.
September 28: A Visit to the Winery
Apparently Kris borrowed daughter Kim Kardashian's best friend/personal slave/left hand Jonathan Cheban to pay Ben a visit at his winery. It's her dream come true, wine, two young men and a camera.
October 5: Ben is On the Market
When Ben and the girl who won his heart on The Bachelor, Courtney (spelled with a C like a real peasant) Robertson became yet another failed reality show relationship, Kris must've been pretty excited. The floppy-haired young guy with constant access to wine is available? A highly orchestrated run-in surely followed.
October 8: The Jenners Go Public
After months of living apart, the Bruce and Kris make their official separation announcement just three days after Ben and Courtney breakup. Interesting.
October 24: A Date with Yeezus
Ben accompanied Kris and her favorite daughter to one of her future son-in-law's concerts in Oakland. Perhaps the show was followed by a double date?
October 25: Shopping the Kardashian Way
The day after the concert, Kris took Ben along to Barney's New York for one of her favorite pastimes, shopping. She probably dropped thousands on gifts for her new man, meanwhile Bruce was somewhere scrounging up change to get some polo shirts at Walmart.
October 31: Ben Takes the Bentley for a Spin
Kris must've been getting pretty desperate for a Halloween date if she let Ben start driving her ridiculously expensive car without her. He claims that she let's him borrow it because they're friends, but I have a feeling Ben is the only friend of Kris's with 24/7 car privileges.
The new report that claims Kren is a real thing is the latest we've heard about the pair in a while, so what have they been up to? Kris has probably been busy setting up her younger daughters on power dates and planning the next few years of Kim's life. Ben has likely been driving all of Kris's cars, going on free trips and enjoying the lavish gifts she gets him in exchange for...his company.
We'll have to see what the future holds for these two, though now that they're public, I give it two weeks before Ben steps out with a new, more age-appropriate girlfriend. Sorry Kris, he might be good for your image but you cannot be helping his.