Life

Here's How To Find Your Communication Style

by Marissa Higgins
Updated: 
Originally Published: 
Two female colleagues talking in a hallway of modern office
Pekic/E+/Getty Images

Most of us rarely make it through a day without having a conversation with someone — but those conversations can vary greatly because our communication styles might be so vastly different from each other. Some people are naturally outgoing, while others are reserved; some people show attention through active listening, while others prefer guiding the conversation with their own stories; but either way, communication is key to our relationships, both on a personal level and even with strangers. And if you've ever wondered what communication style you have, good news: There's a cool quiz that can help you figure it out!

The quiz, created by Science of Us, specifically hones in on whether someone is a "blurter" or a "brooder" in conversation. Essentially, "blurters" are people who speak quickly, whereas "brooders" are people who wait a long time to formulate their thoughts — which, from the get-go, makes me think of the relationship between extroverts and introverts. As an introvert myself, I assume I will also get the "brooder" result in this quiz. Notably, the quiz is based on research conducted by Dr. William B. Swann Jr. and Peter J. Rentfrow in 2001, currently available in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, which examined the speed at which people respond to things ("blurtaciousness") and how that affects their communication.

While no one knows you better than you know yourself (except maybe your best friend or your mom, to be fair) I think quizzes are a fun way to step back and evaluate yourself and see where you fall compared to others in terms of your personality, habits, and so forth. For the purpose of this article, I'm going to post a few questions and my results below, but you can take the quiz yourself here.

The Quiz

Personally, I'm very contemplative, so it takes me a good bit of time to work through what I'm about to say before I say it. This varies depending on the situation, of course; if I'm in class, for example, I push myself to speak sooner so I can actually get into the discussion instead of sitting contemplatively to the side the entire period.

These questions gave me a bit of pause. For example, I don't have a problem saying what I think if someone asks for an honest opinion or perspective on an issue they're going through. On the other hand, I can have a hard time articulating my own feelings and thoughts. I think the "emotions" question is similarly tricky: If we're talking about someone else's emotions, it's easy for me to veer on the side of caution and tenderness. If it's my own emotional argument, I'm likely to have a hard time articulating myself.

The Results

As I anticipated, I'm much closer to "brooding" than "blurting" in my regular communication style. I like that these results discuss both the positive and negative attributes associated with each communication style, so one isn't necessarily "better" than the other. Jesse Singal at Science of Us explains, "In a “competitive” social situation where whoever makes the biggest splash of a first impression wins, a blurter might have the advantage; in a situation where individuals are being evaluated on the basis of being careful, responsible, and not too quick to jump the gun, a brooder might come across as the better choice." I think this makes a lot of sense: In different scenarios, different communication styles will shine through.

Singal later points out that communication styles aren't something we can change much, anyway, as communication is heavily influenced by stable parts of our personalities. This makes sense to me, as well; I think my fundamental communication style has stayed consistent over the years, and I don't see it changing majorly any time soon.

Want to take the quiz for yourself and see how you communicate? You can check it out here.

Images: Pekic/E+/Getty Images; Marissa Higgins/Bustle (3)

This article was originally published on