Manifesting an upgrade to first class is one thing. Manifesting a person — whether that’s a new romance, a business partner, or friend — is a much more serious ballgame. Before you learn how to manifest someone into your life and beg the universe to make you and Harry Styles fall wildly in love, you might have some emotional homework to do.
“Manifestation is the physical actualization of your subconscious beliefs, thoughts, and emotions,” says manifestation coach Angela Christian. “Manifestation is aligning your mind, body, and spirit with small, actionable steps toward ultimately reaching your goal.”
There’s one thing manifestation isn’t: passive. “It's a new way of life,” says Christian. “To maintain consistent and accurate manifestation results, you'll need to start auditing and upgrading your beliefs, thoughts, emotions, and words.” That might mean taking time to understand your attachment issues before manifesting a new partner, or recognizing your teacher’s pet-like need for approval before seeking out a mentor. No one said it would be easy, but once you manifest that special someone into your life — whatever role that person takes — it’ll all be worth it.
How Manifesting Someone Works
There are plenty of ways to manifest the kind of people you want to surround yourself with, whether that’s a new friend group or Hinge match. Journaling is a popular method, as is creating vision boards. Others prefer repeating affirmations or visualizing their wants while meditating. As long as you are clear on what you want and why, you do you.
When manifesting someone as opposed to something, there’s one catch: you can’t manifest someone against their free will. If that hiring manager isn’t emailing you back, or the cutie you went on a date with last week suddenly fell off the face of the earth, take that as a sign from the universe. Don’t force it.
“You can manifest an ex, a meeting with a celebrity, or a specific friendship, but it will only come into the material plane if it is of the highest good for both of you,” says Rachel Gibler, a Houston-based manifestation coach. “What is right for one is right for both.”
Ready to energetically lure a certain someone into your life? Read on for six essential steps for how to manifest someone.
Specify The Qualities You Want In That Person
Forget focusing on a single person. (Sorry, Harry Styles fans.) Instead, hone in on specific qualities, attributes, and values you want this person to exhibit. Writing “I want to get married” over and over in your journal is too vague. Try something like this instead: “I’m ready for a loving, committed relationship with someone who is funny, adventurous, and loves camping as much as I do.” With that kind of specific input already in mind, your ears are that much more likely to perk up when your Bumble date tells you about the goofy nickname they got hiking the Appalachian trail last year.
Visualize The Experiences You Want To Have Together
Gardening in your backyard. Speaking at a conference in Geneva. Whatever memories you want to make with this person, close your eyes and imagine them happening. “First visualize yourself in your body, then visualize yourself outside of your body watching yourself experience the manifestation — this increases desire in the subconscious mind,” Gibler says.
Imagine How You’ll Feel With Them
“Be very clear on the feeling that you want to experience around this person,” says Christian, “even visualizing certain things they'll say to you.” (Yes, “You’re the most beautiful woman in the world” does count.) If you’re manifesting a new business partner, perhaps you’ll want to feel supported, creative, and energized. When manifesting a new romantic partner, those emotions could veer more towards secure, joyful, and intimate. Break out the feelings wheel and highlight the ones that speak to you.
Create Emotional Space For Them
Before you manifest someone new in your life, take time to clear the emotional cobwebs left behind by others. So long, toxic ex. Goodbye, gaslighting boss. Easier said than done, of course, but doing the legwork of moving on from past relationships opens up space in your life to manifest new ones.
Speak In The Present Tense
When speaking of or writing about the person you want to manifest, nix using the past tense. Start your thoughts with affirmative “I have,” “I want,” or “I need” sentiments instead. Gibler recommends writing letters to the person you want to manifest, using the present tense and positive language. This places your mindset firmly in the now instead of someday.
Ditch The Timeline
When manifesting someone, you must let go of any predictions of how or when they’ll show up. Expecting a 6’2” Spanish model to ring your doorbell at 2:00 p.m. next Saturday is asking for disappointment. “The universe can see a much broader perspective, and will always deliver exactly what you want, or someone/something better,” says Gibler. Be patient and trust the manifesting process.