Low sex drive might not be the stereotype when it comes to men, but it can actually happen when stress takes over. The stereotype surrounding men and sex is that many of them think about sex a lot or don't take much time to get aroused, but certain things can lower male sex drive, and if you're dating a man, it's helpful to know about them.
As a certified health coach, I work with clients on keeping their sex drives at a healthy, balanced intensity, according to the individual's needs. So, some people naturally will have higher libidos than others, but when it plummets, relative to whatever your normal drive is like, it's time to build it back up and figure out what's really going on. Working with men and women, I hear about low libido in men all the time, and coming up with ways to raise the heat again, from both parties in the relationship, can increase wellbeing, relationship satisfaction, health, and personal confidence, overall. If you notice you're less active than usual, or your guy is, here are 11 reasons why that male sex drive is abnormally low. With a few simple lifestyle tweaks and mood-setting strategies, you'll start to feel friskier once again.
According to Dr. Mehran Movassaghi, director of the Providence St. John’s Men’s Health Center, in interview with Reviews.com, depression can lead to having a lower sex drive and a clear dip in testosterone levels in men. To build it up, Dr. Darryn Willoughby, a professor of health, human performance and recreation and the director of the Exercise and Biochemical Nutrition Laboratory at Baylor University, added in the interview that maca and longjack supplements could help.
2. Low Vitamin D
According to Dr. Mercola on his website blog, low levels of vitamin D can lead to decreased sex drive in men. So, to keep those swimmers going strong, you'll need to eat a couple of swimmers, too. Great sources of vitamin D include salmon (and other oily fish), fortified milks, nuts, lean animal proteins, and liver, among others.
3. Selenium Deficiency
Selenium often goes unnoticed, but it's super powerful in increasing libido, according to nutritionist Sheryl Walters over interview with Natural News. If you're not getting enough selenium, your libido could suffer. You can find selenium in Brazil nuts; however, don't eat more than 3 a day, as it can lead to toxicity levels.
4. Resentment Towards Your Partner
If you're feeling unsatisfied in your relationship and you resent your significant other, you might lose the urge to bond between sheets, says licensed marriage and family therapist, Erika Fay, LMFT over email with Bustle. Figure out any issues you're having through communication to relight the spark.
5. Weird Sleeping Patterns
If you're sleeping poorly, perhaps you have sleep apnea, snore, or just can't seem to sleep soundly during the night, that disruption in sleeping patterns can lead to a lower than average sex drive. Because you're so fatigued, you'll be less in the mood to play and have a compromised libido.
6. Sedentary Lifestyle
If you're stuck at an office desk all day or get in very little exercise (even walking, if you need to drive to work each day, for instance), you might notice feeling more sluggish and less frisky when you return home. Leading a sedentary lifestyle can decrease male libido, so try squeezing in an exercise class to boost it back up.
7. A Bad Heart
No, not that you're mean, but rather that you're suffering from heart problems, such as poor vascular circulation, heart disease, high cholesterol, or clogged arteries. If you're prone to these issues, you might notice greater incidence of erectile dysfunction, explained Cully Carson, MD, a Rhodes distinguished professor of Urology at the University of North Carolina to Shape.
According to experts at WebMD, smoking can lead to lower sex drive in men. So, if you're puffing a few after work, you might lose your stamina when you arrive home (which isn't fun for your significant other, you can imagine). Quit smoking for better sex (and health).
Due to a 2009 study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine drinking alcohol can lead to a "whiskey penis," being it's harder for it to be useful when needed. To avoid this, limit drinking or be more mindful of how often you're drinking in the week. It's good to make time for alcohol and sex (both are great).
10. Horrible Stress
Over email with Bustle, Jamin Brahmbhatt, MD, urologist and mens health expert with Orlando Health says that "other life stressors such as loss of job, death of a close friend or family, or personal injury can lead to a decrease desire for sexual activity." When under stress, "your body mentally and physically has to get past this acute phase before it will have the energy to focus on sex again," Brahmbhatt says.
Apparently, your meds can be a problem, too. "Other than antidepressants, other meds can also lower your sex drive. The one getting the most buzz recently thanks to President Trump was Proscar which is used for enlarged prostate. In smaller doses the drug is used to help hair growth. Because both these medications affect the conversion of testosterone it can lead to a drop in sexual drive," Brahmbhatt says. "Other medications known to decrease sex drive include anti-histamines (or allergies), anti-seizure drugs, and pain medication," Brahmbhatt adds.
If you notice any of these symptoms in yourself or your partner, try making some lifestyle tweaks to get that spark back.