What We Dreaded About Valentine's Day In The '90s

Back in middle school, the idea of receiving your first kiss was both incredibly exciting and terrifying. We worried that all the practicing we did on pillows and posters of JTT wasn’t enough. Valentine’s Day romance put a lot of ideas in our heads, and we half expected, half hoped that by the end of the day we’d be puckering up. Being raised on plenty of fairy tale movies, I had some pretty bonkers expectations of what my first kiss would be like (fireworks, singing animals, perhaps a ball gown...), but real life doesn’t often work out that way. Thankfully no one tried to go in for a smooch on Valentine’s Day, though there was some pretty intense hand holding on the playground one year.

While kissing was clearly so gross back in the ‘90s, there were always a few couples at school that took the liberty of making their affections known come Feb. 14. At some point, you were bound to come across people kissing by the lockers or during recess, and there was nothing you could do about it. I dreaded it because I was still covering my eyes in embarrassment when Pacey and Joey kissed, or when Rose took off her dress in front of Jack; I certainly didn’t want to witness any PDA in real life!

The rule that you must give a card to every person in your class lead to some pretty awkward consequences. You would fret over finding the perfect catch-all card that didn't come off too flirty because you didn't want your crush to suspect that you liked them; but, you also didn't want to give the school bully any ammunition for teasing you. You couldn't hazard giving princess themed cards because that would be too suggestive of romance, so you were left to choose from something more innocuous like Ninja Turtles or Ren and Stimpy.

If only we realized back then that it wasn't what was on the Valentine that mattered, but whether or not it came with candy.

I loved to dress up for holidays and consequently always wore a costume to school on Halloween, but Valentine's Day was a little harder to gauge. I would want to wear pink or red to school, but I dreaded the thought of showing up and being the only one who put in any effort. You could never tell if you'd be dubbed the class baby for being to excited about a "dumb love holiday that is just made up by the greeting card companies."

In the dead of winter, a rash of pink and red would fill stores, reminding us that Valentine's Day was on its way. If seeing all the heart-shaped symbols, teddy bears, Cupids, and candy didn't fill your heart with dread, than all that nauseating lovey-dovey stuff would.

There was always a chance when Valentine's Day rolled around that someone would find the courage enough to call you on your home landline and ask you out. You dreaded that phone call, because clearly this classmate was not the person that your last game of M.A.S.H. predicted you'd wind up with. You had to let them down gently, which was always awkward, so you could continue to wait so one day you could move to Paris with Joshua Jackson and have 100 kids.

No matter how much you wanted to avoid the pageantry of the holiday and the over-the-top gestures, there was always a small part that wanted to be surprised with candy and flowers (OK, maybe just the candy) from an secret admirer. The fact that it might or might not happen left you in a constant state of panic in the days leading up to the 14th.

It's hard to believe, but even in middle school, there was pressure to do something special on Valentine's Day if you were going out with someone. There would be suggestive winks and nudges from friends, but usually the couples would end up going on a very chaste group date to the mall. Nothing says romance like the foodcourt next to Wet Seal!

Before the Valentine's Day dance, I inevitably would have nightmares that if I stepped on my partner's toe during a romantic slow song, no one would ever dance with me again. I was way more comfortable with dances where I already knew the moves like the Macarena or the Cotton-Eye Joe. Had I known that in just a few short years the "grind line" would appear, I wouldn't have spent so much time griping about dancing to Aerosmith's "Don't Want To Miss A Thing."

'Cause let's face it, sometimes, Valentine's Day was a whole lot of fun!