14 Funny St. Patrick's Day Instagram Caption Ideas That Will Make Your Friends Laugh Out Loud

St. Patrick's Day is almost upon us — are you ready?

While you probably have plenty of plans with your squad in development for this March 17 — which, luckily, falls on a Saturday this year — there is still more prep to consider. Namely, what funny St. Patrick's Day Instagram captions you can use while taking your ah-dorable pictures in green. That way you won't have to waste too much of your valuable time dreaming up an Instagram caption when you could be, say, cooking yourself an Irish stew, or belting an Irish drinking song, as one does on this such occasion.

But before we get too into that, it will probably help to have a more basic understanding of this holiday, if you don't already. For instance — why do we celebrate St. Patrick's Day? What is the importance of all these things we associate with the holiday?

St. Patrick, an Irish missionary who has many legends circulating around his life, is credited with bringing Christianity to Ireland. He died on March 17, 461 A.D., and the St. Patrick's Day Feast in his honor became officially recognized as a holiday in the 17th century.

As for that shamrock you see everywhere, it's traditionally used to explain the idea of the trinity (an important belief of Christianity that represents Jesus, God and the Holy Spirit) to the Irish. Green represents the time in the 17th century when the Irish Catholic Confederation utilized a green harp flag, and it's just managed to stick ever since.

Since then, the holiday has obviously taken on an international life of its own, with people even here in the States celebrating a love for the day ... or at least a love of Irish culture and its booze and jolly attitudes. Here are some funny quotes to get you laughing in celebration:

1. "The legend goes that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland. I was thinking ... that must be hard to put all the tiny seatbelts on all the snakes." — Ellen DeGeneres

2. "An Irishman is never drunk as long as he can hold onto one blade of grass to keep from falling off the earth." — Irish Saying

Channel your inner Irish self and flounce around to your heart's content (you've earned it!).

3. "Never iron a four-leaf clover because you don't want to press your luck." — Unknown


You gotta admit, this is pretty clever.

4. "It is better to spend money like there's no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there's no money!" — Irish Saying

I could see this quote being a bit of a slippery slope, but it certainly is inspiring. We all need to feel carefree once in a while, and what better way to accomplish that than through this saying?

5. "We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English." — Winston Churchill


People who are proud to be Irish (or on this day, Irish adjacent) will get a kick out of this one.

6. "May you die in bed at ninety-five years, shot by a jealous husband (or wife)." — Irish Toast

What perfect way to party with friends than to wish them a long and prosperous life, as long as they are offed by a spiteful lover? It's at least not a boring way to die, ya know?

7. "I'm not going to a distant world. I'm of Ireland, and I'll stay in Ireland until I die!" — Tom Cruise, "Far And Away"


8. "For the whole world is Irish on the Seventeenth o' March!" — Thomas Augustine Daly


9. "There are only two kinds of people in the world, The Irish and those who wish they were." — Unknown


To be fair, they have much better drinking songs than the rest of us.

10. "St. Patrick — one of the few saints whose feast day presents the opportunity to get determinedly whacked and make a fool of oneself all under the guise of acting Irish." — Charles Madigan

Ok, dragged much? Totally true though.

11. "The shamrock is a religious symbol. St. Patrick said the leaves represented the trinity: the Father, the son and the holy spirit. That's why four-leaf clovers are so lucky; you get a bonus Jesus." — Stephen Colbert

12. "St. Patrick's Day is a holy day for Roman Catholics in Ireland to pray and a day for drunk people to vomit with their pants down in New Jersey." — Margot Leitman


13. "St. Patrick's Day is named for St. Patrick, the first guy to feed Guinness to a snake." — Conan O'Brien

14. "If you're enough lucky to be Irish, you're lucky enough!" — Irish Saying

Enjoy your St. Patrick's Day, everyone, and remember — Instagram responsibly!