How To Tune Into Your Intuition When You’re Dating Someone New, According To Psychics
When you're having trouble making decisions in your love life, people often say, "Just follow your intuition." But the word "just" doesn't belong there. Tuning into your intuition is far from easy — unless, that is, you're a psychic.
"When you are dating someone new, you are blinded by the sexual attraction," psychic Milana Perepyolkina, author of Gypsy Energy Secrets: Turning a Bad Day into a Good Day No Matter What Life Throws at You, tells Bustle. "Something illogical (the way [someone] smells, the way their voice sounds, or even the way your astrological charts match) can create a very powerful attraction. The [person] might be completely wrong for you [...] yet you will try to make excuses for them (they will quit drinking soon, they will fall in love with me when they see how wonderful I am, they will become kinder). Your intuition is silenced by your attraction."
In a recent Bustle survey, more than 20 percent of respondents who said they're currently single and dating said their number one frustration with dating is that nothing is sticking. So how can you see past your early infatuation and figure out what your intuition is trying to tell you about a new romantic prospect, then? Here are a few tips on tuning into your intuition from the masters of intuition: psychics themselves.
1Imagine You Are Your Best Friend
We're often better at giving other people advice than we are at taking our own. So, you can hack your advice-giving abilities by pretending you're a different person. "To access your intuition, try to imagine this [person] dating your best friend," Perepyolkina says. "What would you tell her if she tells you repeatedly that they do not contact her often? What would you suggest if she makes excuses for their rudeness? Write all of the negative behaviors on a piece of paper and see if you would accept them from a friend you are not dating. Trying to be objective will be hard but definitely worth it."
2Make A Preference List
Another way to evaluate a romantic prospect is to create a list of your preferences and your dealbreakers, psychic Davida Rappaport tells Bustle. "If you stay present, you can see how your new person stacks up to your list of preferences and dealbreakers," she says. "If your date does something that resonates with your lists, you will get a twinge or a gut feeling that this person either feels 'right' or triggered a 'red flag.' As long as you know what you are looking for in a potential partner and have that tucked away, it will resurface at the right time. Don’t push it aside, trust it."
3Meet In Person ASAP
It's easier to get an intuition about someone you've met face-to-face, Rappaport says. It's also harder to drown out your intuition with fantasies this way. "Meet your prospective date in person for coffee or a safe date before you start texting and emailing excessively," she says. "If you do not do this, you may get caught up in your thoughts; when this happens, your fantasies and emotions may take center stage. The sooner you meet someone, the easier it will be for you to trust your intuition so you will not be clouded by your emotions and dreams."
When you're on a date with someone, pay attention to what they're saying and doing. Otherwise, you can start to get caught up in your fantasies about them, Rappaport says. "It is very easy to get swayed by someone’s appearance, words, and the chemistry you may feel," she says. "If you manage to stay focused in the moment, you can catch any red flags that may be there because you will not be thinking about your future with them before you have a chance to get to know them better. While it may feel like love at first sight, it may just be chemistry and wishful thinking. If you are present, you will see the person for who they are and your intuition will support you. You will just know."
Meditation is a great way to tune into your intuition in any area of life, Rappaport says. During the early stages of a new relationship, you can meditate before a date. "If you meditate, you will be centered and able to see things as they are," she says. "If you are stuck, you can also set your intention and ask for clarity prior to meditating. You want to be grounded and live moment-by-moment so you don’t get into your head and start thinking. If you overthink or overanalyze, you will shut off your intuition."
6Look For Signs
If you ask the universe a question, you may later find signs in your environment that answer it, psychic medium Caroline E. Zani tells Bustle. For example, you might hear song lyrics that relate to your situation, or see an object that's relevant to it. "Be really open to the idea that the universe is showing you if this person is a good match or not," Zani says.
7Try To Tune Into Them When You're Apart
People who are true matches may have an almost telepathic connection, where you can feel each other's presence when you're not together. Zani recommends asking yourself when you hear your phone's notification sound if you think it's a text from them. If you can accurately predict it, this may be a sign of a special connection. "Conversely, if you are anxious and feeling like you may never see this person again, know that your intuition is speaking," she says. "Don’t despair, and don’t push... let the universe bring someone else — a closer match."
Before a big conversation with someone you're dating, Zani suggests setting intentions for that discussion. "Ask that the discussion and outcome are in everyone’s highest and best interest," she says. "Then take some time to write out a script with what you will say and what you want to hear from the other person. Then, try not to fall off your chair when you hear those exact words come out of their mouth!"
9Wear Light Colors On Dates
Lighter colors leave us more open to energies, psychic Deborah Graham, host of SiriusXM's "The Psychic Connection" and author of Get Your Head Out of Your App: A Psychic's Guide to Attracting and Keeping True Love, tells Bustle. "Don’t wear black on the first date," she says. "It not only blocks your energy from the other person, but it also blocks your energy from yourself to be able to access your intuition."
10Bring A Clear Quartz Crystal With You
"Clear crystal quartz helps to open the mind and the heart to higher guidance and enhances clarity," Graham says. You can buy one here and slip it into your bag before a date to heighten your intuitive powers.
11Pay Attention To Their Body Language
One way our intuition speaks to us is through our ability to read others' body language. When you're on a date with someone, pay attention to the nonverbal cues they're sending. "If their arms are crossed when with you, they are blocking you from their energy," Graham says. "Always touch the person — hand, shoulder, and/or arm. You should be able to feel cold (their ego blocking you) or warmth (a connection) just from the touch." And make sure to look into their eyes. "If they are constantly looking left or right, or over you — their energy is not connecting with you," Graham says.
"Energy travels," Graham says. "If you sit still, be calm, and focus on the person, you can feel their spirit speak to you. You can become really in tune with your intuition and the psychic language between you and another person. You don’t need words to determine if a connection exists."
Tapping into your intuition certainly isn't always easy in dating, but being able to understand — and listen — to your gut feelings can transform the way you approach your love life. By setting intentions, paying attention to signs from the person you're dating, and staying focused, you'll be off to an excellent start.