Finding love requires more than just the actions of going on dates or setting up an online dating profile. It also requires opening yourself up to love and giving off the vibe that you're open. You may not even realize it if you're
energetically blocking out love, but your potential partners might.
"There are three areas in which we can review indicators to identify if we are blocking ourselves off from love, typically demonstrated when on a first date or when out with friends and being approached,"
psychic Deborah Graham, host of SiriusXM's "The Psychic Connection" and author of , tells Bustle. These areas are body language, physical appearance, and personality. According to Graham, these are manifestations of a deeper, energetic blockage that is telling the universe you're Get Your Head Out of Your App: A Psychic's Guide to Attracting and Keeping True Love not ready for a relationship.
If you notice these signs in yourself, it may mean you have some fears or insecurities to sort through before you can form a healthy, long-lasting relationship. Or, it could mean that this just
isn't the right time for you to enter into a relationship, which is fine.
Here are some signs that your energy may be closed off to love, according to Graham.
Your Body Language Is Closed Off
If you want to know how open to love you are, analyze your body language on dates. Arms crossed over your body indicate that there's something you're trying to hide, says Graham, and facing away from your partner indicates that you may not want them to fully get to know you.
The energy of dark colors can deflect love away from you, says Graham. People tend to associate these colors with sadness, solitude, and defiance. Wearing them may reflect a subconscious understanding that they'll ward people off.
You Greet People With A Frown
A displeased expression can have the same effect as dark colors, says Graham. It gives off the message "go away," and people will interpret it accordingly.
You Wait For People To Come To You
Starting conversations with others sends the universe the message that you're open to love, says Graham, even if the people you're talking to aren't romantic interests. That's why
she recommends things like paying for coffee for the person in front of you in line. It sends the universe the message that you're open to new connections.
Unless someone does something truly awful, Graham recommends seeing dates through until the end if you want to convey that you're really open. Even if nothing's going to happen with your date, you never know who they know or
what else you might be able to gain from that connection.
You Date People You Don't See A Future With
Continuing to date people you couldn't see yourself with in the long-term blocks your energy off from the people you actually could see yourself with, says Graham. It tells the universe that you're not ready to find your forever, and it may reflect hesitations to settle down.
You Compare People To Your Ex
If everyone you meet either reminds you of your ex or falls short in comparison to your ex, there may still be an energetic chord between you two, says Graham. It's important to gain closure, either with them or within yourself, before you can truly be open to someone else.
If you think you're closing your energy off to love and want
to open it, Graham recommends making eye contact with people, going out alone, and visualizing your perfect match during meditation in order to manifest them in your life.