It's still unconfirmed, but there are rumors circulating that Ryan Seacrest may host the American Idol reboot. And I'm not trying to start any drama or anything, but if he does, I'm going to need to see some proof that this man is actually using the nighttime to sleep. I figured once he signed on for a job as intensive as Live! with Kelly Ripa, he'd pare down his responsibilities, not add to them. But interestingly, the new addition to his schedule seems only to have made this Time Lord more powerful. With each new claim on Seacrest's time and energy, he seems to grow stronger, and now I need to know if any of you have actually seen him close his eyes. My current theory is that he either gets a full night's worth of sleep every time he blinks, or that he spends his nights awake and emailing, plugged into a charging port.
Because truly, genuinely, I don't have any other explanation for how he would be able to sign onto another project right now. As I said, it isn't official, but a recent profile on the prolific host in The Hollywood Reporter makes Seacrest's participation in the Idol reboot sound very, very likely. "Who am I if not the American Idol guy?" he asked in the interview, adding, "I've always loved the show. And if I could do it forever, I would do it forever." After an allegedly long negotiation process, the 42-year old is reportedly all but signed on, according to THR's sources. (Bustle reached out to reps at ABC, who had no comment at this time.)
But Seacrest's fondness for the show only explain why he would want to be a part of it. It gives me exactly zero explanation for how that's physically possible for a human mortal with a REM cycle. As THR noted, this schedule would have some pretty insane requirements. It would include starting his week with an overnight flight from the LA set of Idol on Sunday night to be ready to go live Monday morning on Live with Kelly and Ryan. Every. Single. Week.
And that's before we even talk about his radio show, or the fact that he's an executive producer on the Kardashian-Jenner franchise. And you better hope there isn't a red carpet event that week, or they may have to hang him upside down like a bat in the closet to catch a little shut eye between on-camera interviews.
I just... can't imagine how this schedule would be possible for a normal human. And I'm not saying that Seacrest definitely is a Time Lord, to whose dominion hours and minutes bow down. But if he wants me to believe that he isn't, I'm gonna definitely need to see some sleep receipts.
Editor's Note: This story has been updated from its original version.