Self-talk is the tiny voice we all have inside our heads that either cheers us on, in a positive way, or knocks us down, in a negative way. And while positive self-talk often sounds the same for everyone, with phrases like "you got this!" and "you're
amazing," negative self-talk is often more specific to the person thinking it — especially if you break it down by zodiac sign.
When thinking about things in terms of astrology, the type of negative self-talk each sign if prone to usually lies in the strengths and weakness inherent to each sign. "Each sign of the zodiac denotes the different soul journeys, and each comes with its strengths and weaknesses,"
life coach and astrologer Joshua MacGuire tells Bustle. "Every sign is vulnerable to negative self-talk; the negative self-talk they have to abate often comes down to their spiritual lessons — their weaknesses that need to become strengths for this lifetime." That's why one sign's negative self-talk might be rooted in their need to be seen and loved, while for others, it might come about due to the fact they're jealous by nature, or more controlling.
There is good news, though, in that each sign has the ability to balance out these negative traits and the thoughts associated with them, and adopt a
more positive form of self-talk, simply by being aware of their thinking. Here, MacGuire breaks it down for each sign, and offers a few tips on creating more positive self-talk.
Aries (March 21 - April 19): Worrying Whether Or Not Others Notice Them
For super assertive Aries, they can find themselves worrying about whether or not
people notice them, often thinking things like "nobody knows me," or "nobody cares I exist." Thoughts like these can happen to anyone, but for Aries, are usually due to issues they've dealt with in the past.
"What pushes their soul purpose is their past experiences of abandonment and being left behind," MacGuire says. And that can serve as a great motivator. "Without having experienced such hardships, they would not be compelled to be standouts in the world." But it can serve Aries to remember that the past is in the
past, and therefore the future can be different.
"Aries is destined to be number one in whichever domain they choose, but if they indulge self-talk in which they're the victim, their competitive nature and purpose will be diffused."
Taurus (April 20 - May 20): Not Feeling Worthy
"Taurus rules finances and possessions, but Taurus' journey is really about self-worth," MacGuire says. "When a Taurus doesn't feel worthy, they can indulge in the self-talk that asserts that there's lack. This can result in stingy, hoarding, or possessive behavior." So the faster they can turn that negative self-talk off, the better.
"When Taurus realizes how worthy they are as people, irrespective of their bank balance and possessions, they can flow living a life of rich abundance in all regards," MacGuire says. "They need to find worthiness through the expression of their voice and talent, not through material possessions — otherwise there will never be enough to fill up their sense of lack."
Gemini (May 21 - June 20): Anxiety Over Measuring Up To Others
Since Gemini can be
hard on themselves, they can easily spend a day wondering if they're smart enough, or measuring up to others. "Gemini values the mind so much that they pride themselves on their intelligence," Macguire says. "It's ridiculous for them at times to think they're not smart — they're so smart. But because they're ruled by the twins, there's a side of them that can play devil's advocate in all matters, particularly in regard to their confidence about their greatest gift."
The best thing the can do is realize this self-talk doesn't have to do with their actual level of intelligence, but rather their anxiety surrounding it. "If Gemini just realizes that it's because they value the mind so much, that they doubt themselves mentally sometimes, thoughts of being mentally deficient will be ameliorated."
Cancer (June 21 - July 22): Worrying That No One Cares About Them
Cancer's greatest worry is that no one cares about them, and as a result, they often feel slighted wherever they go. "Cancer feels so deeply and cares so deeply, that by comparison, other people to them may appear callous and unfeeling," MacGuire says, which leads to the negative self-talk. "This is problematic, because it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy, as they solicit from others their pre-made assumptions."
To put a stop to their worries, Cancer should work on their self-esteem. Part of that is taking the time to see that others may not be as emotionally aware as they are, but that doesn't mean they don't care, MacGuire says. "This may help them to not take others' lack of sensitivity so personally," MacGuire says.
Leo (July 23 - August 22): Thinking Others Are Out To Get Them
Leo is incredibly competitive by nature, and often worry that others are out to get them. "Perhaps it's because they project their competitive nature onto others, but Leo expects other people to be threats in some way," MacGuire says. "This is not always the case, and comes across as outrageous to people who mean them no harm."
While a little bit of healthy competition is OK — and even beneficial — Leo should do themselves a favor, and try to see the intentions of others for what they really are. "If Leo can understand their competitive instincts are not universal, they'll be less likely to attract adversaries. Most people want to love and enjoy Leo, and if Leo realizes this, the better their world will be."
Virgo (August 23 - September 22): Feeling Like They're Not Good Enough
Virgo is another sign that's extremely
hard on themselves, and as a result, often have an "I'm not good enough" tape playing in their head. "Virgos tend to be the most competent, but the most insecure sign of the zodiac," MacGuire says. "Their overcompensatory nature comes from being born at a time when their parents weren't getting along, and having internalized this conflict thinking it was their fault." And as a result, they often go through life feeling less-than.
But Virgo can turns things around, once they're aware of their negative self-talk tendencies. "If Virgo realizes that they're blameless and that most things aren't their fault, they can subdue their perfectionistic nature and enjoy themselves more," MacGuire says. "Otherwise, they may be very self-critical with self-talk that negates the extreme value they give to the world."
Libra (September 23 - October 22): Fear Of Being Cheated On
For Libra, their negative self-talk usually revolves around a
fear of being cheated on or left by their partner — even though they often don't have any evidence to support their worries. This is usually due to projection, "meaning that we guess what other people would do by using our own perspectives," MacGuire says. "For Libras who are relationship-centric, they believe other people are the same way. When a partner needs some space, for instance, they may jump to the conclusion that they're having an affair. For them, it's hard to fathom there's not someone else, because that's the only reason they might be distracted."
While some worries are understandable, by always expecting the worst, Libra is truly doing a disservice to their own mental health, and the health of their relationship. And that's why they can benefit from trusting themselves. "If Libra realizes that they're aces in relationships — that nobody does it better than them — their self-talk about being cheated on may subside."
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21): Paranoia
Scorpios often see life in a negative light, and usually have dark, paranoid thoughts to match. "Scorpio sees life as a battlefield," MacGuire says. "They're aware of their own primal impulses ... and project those upon others, resulting in paranoia."
But that doesn't mean Scorpio can't think positive, if they'd like to change their ways, and have a healthier outlook. "If Scorpio can realize their primal impulses are more prominent in themselves, they need not have to be so defensive," MacGuire says. "Whatever we think and project out into the world, we get back. If Scorpio can focus on their higher nature as healers and transformers of the world, their self-talk will be less geared toward protecting themselves and their relationships will be more enjoyable."
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21): Overthinking
A Sagittarius' mind can be full of confusing self-talk, that
bounces from one thing to the next, which is why "the Sagittarian plight is overthinking," MacGuire says. If they aren't wondering about one thing, they're worrying about another, and they often don't know how to stop themselves.
To put a stop to this pattern, Sagittarius might find it helpful keep in mind that overthinking can actually be detrimental. "They have to make sure their big brains are not working against them," MacGuire says. "If they could shut off their minds sometimes, their lives would be fairy tales come true."
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19): Believing Things Won't Work Out
For Capricorn, their negative self-talk centers on the belief that their dreams and plans won't work out. "Capricorn prides themselves on being realistic, but they can walk a fine line into pessimism," MacGuire says. "Their self-talk can often negate all the great things they have coming to them because they work so hard."
To turn this negative self-talk into a positive, Capricorn should remember that looking on the bright side can actually get them further in life. "By expecting the worst, they unwittingly increase their chances of the worst happening. They should consider other equally good alternatives to their ideal, and not naysay their highest expectations."
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18): Thinking No One "Gets" Them
Aquarius is one sign that often feels misunderstood, so they're more prone to go through life thinking things like "nobody gets me." As MacGuire says, "This can catalyze innovative methodologies and inventions, but can also make them feel alone. By believing that 'nobody gets them' Aquarians are being lazy by not seeking out common ground and communicating their feelings." Or, in other words, not
utilizing their uniqueness, and forming bonds because of it.
"Part of the problem is that Aquarians are often detached from their emotions, so in not sharing them there can be a lack of understanding between themselves and others, for it's emotions that make us all the same," MacGuire says. That's why, the more Aquarius can open up, and connect with others, the better they'll feel.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20): Thinking They're Incapable Of Something
As the dreamers of the zodiac, Pisces are often more comfortable thinking instead of actually doing, and as a result can feel ill-equipped when it comes to dealing with the realities of life. They might worry that they can't do something, or feel overwhelmed, and thus are constantly "looking for an escape," MacGuire says. "By telling themselves that they can't handle what they have going on, they give themselves license to abandon ship and not follow through."
And yet, Pisces is perfectly capable of doing whatever they set their minds to, just like every other sign. "If Pisces realizes that they can handle anything and gives themselves the necessary breaks and self-care they need, they can create a new, self-empowering narrative." Which is often the best way to counteract negative self-talk.
By being aware of it, and making a few changes for the better, each sign has
the potential to think positively, and fill their head with healthier, happier thoughts.