Are you a fan of joy? Spontaneous good times? Parties all the more necessary for being a little unnecessary? Then please, direct your attention to the photos from Oprah’s Wonder Woman Party, because they're basically visual Prozac. If you'd ever nursed a suspicion that the talk show host would be the world's best roomie, then these are effectively proof that your hunch is not intuition, it is FACT.
In her first Instagram video on the topic, she describes herself as celebrating "Wonder Woman Day." But, you guys, not to be picky, but the official Wonder Woman Day was on June 3. So, effectively, this is just your favorite talk show titan inventing a holiday because she does what she pleases. And what is a Wonder Woman party?
According to Oprah, it involves inviting 28 ten year olds over (she doesn’t explicitly say this, but, presumably, this is in response to the film’s themes of female empowerment and the fact that Wonder Woman is having a big effect in kindergartens). This bolsters my whole Oprah would be the ideal roommate theory. Since there doesn't appear to be any sort of promotional tie-in, she seems to be doing this out of the goodness of her own heart. She's such a giving person, there's no way she'd leave you running high and dry on toilet roll.
But not only is she spontaneous and big-hearted, she's also practical. Preparations for the most fun looking party in town seem to have started well in advance of the big day. How else to explain the fact that there are even Wonder Woman popcorn buckets and cuffs for everyone attending? How did she even know where to find a Gal Gadot cake topper?
You know your weekly movie night would become so much better organized with this lady as one of your roomies. And should you have a cleaning plan, all disputes would be solved as if by magic by the sheer organizational prowess of this admirable woman.
But wait, you say. What on earth are these kids going to wear on their feet? Will they go around in sneakers, exactly like they'd never even heard of Themyscira? No, fools. When you party at Oprah's house, the devil is in the details. Which means Wonder Woman flip flops.
I can't even. Can you imagine throwing a house party with this woman? She would definitely shell out extra for little cocktail drink umbrellas and fancy napkins. There's no way you'd be stuck using Christmas tree lights to jazz up your apartment.
But wait. It gets better. You know the food for this thing is going to be incredible, right? Think catered, think two options (one for parents, one for kids), think happy chefs bantering easily in the sunlight with a media mogul and woman living her best possible life. Can you imagine what your Thanksgiving would look like with this person in charge of the food?
I wish I could stop, but I can't, because neither can Oprah. The award for best Wonder Woman party picture has to go to the following still, of the 63 year old and her dog both sporting Diana tiaras. I don't even want to ask where a person can buy such a thing, because then I'll have to go ahead and actually buy a dog, just so I can dress it up as Gal Gadot.
I think we can all agree on two key points: the Mississippi native knows how to throw a hell of a party, and, if you weren't feeling her as a potential roommate before, how can you resist now?