What Does “The Divine Feminine” Mean? It’s So Much More Than A New Age Buzzword
Whenever I heard that astrologers had dubbed 2017 the year of the "Divine Feminine Rising," I would picture a voluptuous goddess with flowing locks of hair, emerging from the sea on a giant scalloped shell, Venus-style. This was, however, before I met Suzanne Kingsbury, author and founder of Gateless Writing, Inc., explained that under the hood of what I would typically brush off as just the latest New Age buzzword, there’s so much more to be explored.
Since the Divine Feminine is a concept grounded in spirituality, definitions can vary depending on who you ask. According to Kingsbury, however, who has led retreats on the topic for over 10 years, “the Divine Feminine is an energy that has been with us since ancient times." She tells Bustle, "Consciousness is basically divided up into the ‘masculine’ side and the ‘feminine’ side, and we need both to achieve our highest creative potential." In other words, the Divine Feminine represents the connection to the part of your consciousness responsible for nurture, intuition, and empathy, regardless of your gender. According to Kingsbury, the Divine Feminine is the aspect of the self associated with "creation, intuition, community, sensuality (felt sense rather than thinking sense), and collaboration."
Though on its surface, the concept seems to play into the gender binary, Kingsbury explains that it's an energy that's available to anyone. “People often think the Divine Feminine is only for women, but in fact [everyone carries] feminine and masculine wisdom and tools,” Kingsbury explains.
And it’s a powerful energy at that. By helping her clients better tune into their Divine Feminine energy, Kingsbury has seen them build stronger relationships with colleagues, friends, significant others, and themselves, which can all lead to both concrete personal and professional gains. Hearing Kingsbury talk about the personal and professional success she’s witnessed was enough to start wondering about how to channel this energy in day-to-day life. Bustle spoke with Kingsbury about her advice on how to get ahead in your relationships, career, and connection to the inner self, by tapping into the power of the Divine Feminine.
Cooperate Rather than Compete
According to Kingsbury, our need to compete dates back to our early days as humans, where others were a threat to survival. "Because we've been brought up with the belief that competition is inherent to success, we often look at others as possible threats." We may still feel an urge to fight for what’s ours, which can create a cutthroat environment in both the personal and professional realms, whether that’s fighting for a partner or a promotion. But, Kingsbury explains, "the most successful among us have evolved. They understand that if you perceive others’ success as a threat, it’s difficult to move ahead yourself." To really harness your divine feminine is to flip the script on those you view as threats and reposition that as allies, viewing them as mentors for their ability to forge new and exciting pathways in the world. This can be a particularly powerful tool when it comes to professional networking. “Instead of focusing on how you may feel less than the most powerful person in the room, focus on bringing this person into your circle and consider what value you can add to [their] life. It will immediately make you feel more competent and powerful,” Kingsbury suggests.
Sense Rather than Think
We’ve been brought up in a society that often advocates rational decisions are the best decisions, often even when it comes love. “We have been taught to choose a mate with the thinking mind, [based on] what their résumé looks like, what career path they are following, how good looking they are or how much money they make,” Kingsbury tells Bustle. “The fact of the matter is the cognitive mind often misses red flags. The body actually knows before the brain does who is toxic for you.” You must tune into the sensory body rather than the thinking mind to truly connect with your innate intuition, which can be a powerful guide in authentic decision making. In other words? “Ask the body, not the mind, to avoid future heartache,” Kingsbury advises.
Create Rather than Deconstruct
In any given moment, a lot of intel runs through the mind, which Kingsbury calls "our ‘self talk’." More often than not, that voice can play a highly judgmental role, acting as an inner critic that cautions us away from risk and tells us how to fix and better ourselves. However, according to Kingsbury, that’s not the true role self-talk should serve. “Because we have been separated from the Divine Feminine for so long, we’ve lost our ability to truly understand this voice. Another, softer voice exists below the inner critic, that celebrates you. This is a voice of possibility that encourages you to create, reminds you of the upside of risks and points out your resourcefulness.” It’s only by silencing the inner critic that we can access this more meaningful voice. One powerful way to do this is to think about what you did right in your life, what you have accomplished, rather than what brought shame or made you feel inept. “This simple shift will have an incredible impact,” Kingsbury says.
Compliment Rather than Criticize
"When interacting with others, we’re often taught to focus on what’s wrong, rather than what’s right," says Kingsbury. But have you ever considered doing the opposite? “Brain science shows that what we focus on grows. Focus on what you don't like in the other person, and you’ll find this magnified." Similar to setting an intention and waiting for that intention to manifest, an attitude adjustment could make a huge difference in how you access your divine feminine. “You will be amazed by how it changes your relationships,” Kingsbury promises.