Entertainment

What If Seth Cohen Was On Tinder?

by Mary Grace Garis

The sad reality of dating is that no man can hold a candle to The O.C.'s Seth Cohen. This is a heart-wrenching fact that we all recognize of while we're aimlessly swiping through potential suitors on our iPhones. Nobody even comes close to romantic perfection, with all of his coffee cart love declarations and 1862.21 days of Summer (that's five years, we're talking fifth grade infatuation to tenth grade when it got physical). You wish that someone like Seth Cohen was on Tinder. But wait... what if he was on Tinder?

Imagine a world where The O.C. was set in 2015. We all know that Summer would be the veritable Queen of Instagram and Seth would be a big hit on Twitter, but what if they converged on your (least) favorite dating app? Summer would be be flipping through for hot water polo players of course, but Seth would be sheerly motivated by his lack of ladies. Only at the urging of Ryan (who can only listen so much about how Seth and Summer are meant to be because of their shared love of Chipotle) would he finally sign up, and reluctantly search for... whatever one searches for on Tinder.

Allow me to set the stage of what would happen if Seth was on Tinder.

He'd Have Ryan Help Cultivate His Tinder Profile Look

Seth slumps against the wall in a totally natural I-sit-on-the-floor-of-my-house look. "Tell me, Ryan, does this look capture a sense of mystery with enough boyish earnestness to look approachable? Or like, should I change into another sweater?" Ryan doesn't have the answers for that, and barely the tolerance to take the photo in the first place, but hey, it was his idea for Seth to do this.

What Ryan does help out with is the bio, which Seth can't help stressing out about. After Ryan vetoes three or four Death Cab for Cutie lyrics, Seth finally panics and tells Ryan to just pick one Seth's witticisms. Ryan, every the minimalist, chooses something straightforward.

After Passing Up Many Fine Ladies (Or Getting Passed Up Himself) Seth Finally Gets A Match!

Apparently this Anna chick just got here by way of Pittsburgh and, well... she's no Summer, but her profile made her seem pretty cool. Honestly, any girl showing attention to him ever is kind of an occasion worth celebrating, so he goes for it and the two trade ~actual phone numbers~. Soon these crazy kids are talking.

Weird, it seems that Anna actually kind of digs him. When Tinder said they'd be a match, he didn't expect that like, they'd have everything in common. It's a little... much, but he enjoys texting Anna during classes, and one day they may actually meet. In his spare time Seth, now feeling like quite the stud, swipes through Tinder, and makes the conscious choice to swipe left on Summer.

Big mistake. Huge.

Seth Feels The Wrath Of Summer... At Three In The Morning

Seth told Ryan who told Marissa who told Summer that Seth was becoming quite the ladies man (exact words: "Yeah, I think Seth has like a Tinder girlfriend now). Summer, out with Marissa on a Vodka-and-More-Vodka night, feels totally burned that Cohen isn't giving her attention anymore. And he dared to swipe left on her? Seth wakes up to a whole slew of angrily jealous texts and... somewhat suggestive Snapchats.

It's a Tinder miracle.

Images: Warner Bros. Television; Mary Grace Garis/Bustle (4)