Celebrity crushes are as natural as rain falling in spring because famous people are usually shaped and crafted to be one thing above all else: sexually desirable. And, girl, do we desire them. The conversation over which celebrities you want to have sex with never really gets old. It seems like as soon as puberty hits, we are lusting after TV stars and movie stars and whatever the latest boy band is. When I was first discovering that now all-too-familiar pitter patter-that is a new crush on some pretty famous girl or boy, everyone was drooling over JTT and Leo. (Yeah, I know I just dated myself hard right there.) I couldn’t resist the pull of JTT because, well, look at that hair but I managed to scorn Leo until it wasn’t “cool” anymore because I was a rebel like that.
My best friend Jaime loved Will Smith. Everyone had a favorite Backstreet Boy and usually a favorite N’Sync boy too, unless you were really hardcore and therefore pledged your allegiance to one boy band and one boy band only. We would talk about our celebrity crushes, paste our walls with posters of their faces, and watch everything they appeared in. Celebrity crushes? More like celebrity obsessions.
As adults, though, we don’t display our love as blatantly as we did as tweens and teens. We might still get worked up over a particular actor or singer but chances are we aren’t wearing their faces on oversized tees anymore. Instead, it seems, plenty of adult women are enjoying their celebrity crushes in more… intimate ways.
Yup, you got it: Women around the world are masturbating furiously with images of their favorite celebrities scrolling through their minds. Oh, you want to know who? Funny you should ask, because I happen to have a small sampling of women who were willing to share exactly which celebrities are sharing their beds — in their imaginations.
1. Ro, 23
Eric from True Blood (obviously a character, not a celebrity but f*ck)
2. Elizabeth, 30
Max Greenfield, Joshua Jackson
3. Elizabeth, 29
Brandon Boyd (lead singer of Incubus)
4. Emma, 25
5. Wren, 28
Jason Lee, Benedict Cumberbatch, Jason Schwartzman, Ewan McGregor
6. Brat, 28
7. Sarah, 30
It's so cliche, but I can't help it...Channing Tatum, Joe Manganiello
8. Josie, 31
Adam Ant circa 1981-2.
9. Lily, 26
10. Gaby, 32
Definitely showing my age with this one, but Jarvis Cocker from Pulp. Basically any cute guy who fronted a British rock band in the '80 or '90s, actually.
11. Emily, 26
Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds
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Images: Giphy (11); dollen/Flickr